Tag Archive | "Singing Bone Hello Kitty"

SAF delivers Hello Kitties in time, prevents social chaos

SAF delivers Hello Kitties in time, prevents social chaos

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Thank you SAF, we would have died otherwise.

By Klinsen Soh

saf-hello-kitty

Six hours. That was all the time needed to transport one million Singing Bone Hello Kitties to 121 locations across Singapore with military precision.

As the craze in Singapore continued to linger, the Singapore Armed Forces (SAF) joined in efforts to deal with the situation.

Executed on 27 Jun, the mission involved almost all active servicemen not queueing up for the toys (approximately 20).

Dr Ng Eng Hen, who happened to be present at one of the delivery locations, said from his queue spot: “This is a very good example of protecting our nation in crisis so that we can help those who are vulnerable, and in this instance, those from poorer households as well as people who need the kitties but can’t be arsed to wait 4 hours to get them.”

One of the soldiers, 3rd Sergeant (3SG) Hua Tah Ner, said: “I feel that it’s very meaningful and it’s quite enriching. Meaningful, in a sense that… you feel that you’re contributing to society and giving something back with whatever effort you put in.”

“Also, the prices of the Kitties have dropped by at least $30 since my mission ended,” he quipped, showing various sales threads on his touchscreen phone.

When asked about the big wad of $50 notes in his hand, 3SG Hua declined to comment.

On whether there were any difficulties faced in such a large mobilisation exercise, Commander of Key Resource Support Command Colonel (COL) Buay Chao Kuan said: “We understood the emergency and were able to swiftly tap into our stockpile of 9 million Hello Kitty plushies.”

He continued: “McDonalds played a very dangerous game when they chose to create conflict and unrest. People fighting, wasting food, even prostituting themselves, all for the sake of a stupid plush doll made in China. We are proud to have done our part in defending the nation from its biggest crisis since 2000.”

New Nation understands that MINDEF is in midst of banning Mcdelivery to camps because of this incident.

Hello pussy

Hello pussy

Disgruntled S’poreans demanding money back for Black Hello Kitty

Disgruntled S’poreans demanding money back for Black Hello Kitty

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Expect to get money back under Lemon Law.

No bone and cannot sing. Tsk.

No bone and cannot sing. Tsk.

Disgruntled Singaporeans from all walks of life and with varying maturity levels who bought the prized Black Hello Kitty from McDonald’s are asking for a refund under the Lemon Law.

Lemon law protects consumers against defective goods that fail to conform to contract, or meet satisfactory quality or performance standards at the time of purchase.

It’s like getting married only to realise she cannot cook.

One Singaporean, Buay Kong Wei, said the McDonald’s marketing of the Hello Kitty was deceptive: “The Black Hello Kitty cannot sing at all. Then why they still advertise as Singing Bone Hello Kitty?”

This has led to severe confusion.

Another Singaporean, Mei Gu Tou, said “The Hello Kitty don’t even have bone. Then why they still advertise as Singing Bone Hello Kitty?”

The purchase has also caused some Singaporeans to be more independent.

Mei Peng You, a local, said: “I thought that by buying this Black Hello Kitty I will be accepted by my peers, but I am still an outcast. Even more so.”