Singapore battles population explosion of 10m

Posted on 01 August 2014

Citizens urge government to use birth control measures

Singapore should plan for a population of 10 million people by 2090, said former Housing Development Board CEO, Liu Thai Ker at some important nation building seminar on Thursday.

Singapore is not as mature as the Scandinavian countries, which are small but have achieved economic growth despite a slow growing population. Therefore, he said, Singapore should plan its infrastructure to accommodate more people, in case it cannot find a way to grow its economy without a population of serfs slaves underpaid foreign labour new immigrants.

Sorry guys, none of you will ever be offered citizenship.

Sorry guys, none of you will ever be offered citizenship. Nyah nyah nyah nyah nyah.

Liu was basing his 10 million people estimate on the upper limit projection of the 2013 White Paper, which guesstimated that Singapore would need a population of 6.9 million by 2030 to sustain its current economic growth rate. He did not indicate if he was insulting the intelligence of civil servants, who according to basic math, have 76 fucking years to reform current policies.

“You mean all the Oxbridge president scholars combined still cannot solve this economic problem meh?” said Bo Tak Chek, a common citizen who is not a scholar.

Other citizens chided the government for thinking like an immature teenager.

Pak Chiu Cheng, a handphone shop owner in Toa Payoh said: “I tell all my friends, buying a bigger house is not the solution to your wife popping babies once every two years. Wear a fucking condom or DIY, understand?”

This post was written by:

- who has written 268 posts on New Nation.

Joey is an intern at New Nation. He hopes to be as funny as Belmont one day and get laid at least twice a month.

Contact the author

  • Very, Extremely, Quite, Much

    What’s up with the superfluous profanity used.

  • Chiobu

    Welcome to Sinkapore. The titanic island reddot city!

    Chiobu sia!