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NSman’s grandmother gets 85 points taking the new 3-station IPPT

Posted on 24 July 2014

She says 90 points is possible with a bit of training.

ah-ma

An NSman’s 90-year-old grandmother had a go at the new three-station IPPT today and accumulated 85 points.

She did 55 sit-ups, 55 push-ups and completed her timed run in 12 minutes flat. Using the band for a 30-year-old in the scoring system, she accumulated 85 points.

The new three-station IPPT was put into place on July 23, 2014, after Singaporean men complained for years about it like the little bitch they are.

Lau Ah Ma, the grandmother, said: “It is good to see young men as fit as me and not using a walking stick to get around.”

“Some of these Singaporean NSmen need to do more standard push-ups as they are not the ones with saggy breasts.”

“Ya, this new 3-station IPPT is great. SAF can change its name to SAP — Singapore Armed Pussies.”

 

It’s still tough to pass IPPT:
Passing criteria for new 3-station IPPT revealed

This post was written by:

- who has written 2685 posts on New Nation.

Wang Pei can be considered a new citizen of Singapore. She has been here all her life, just that her environment's changed beyond recognition.

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  • Firdy

    Written by a girl, why am I not surprised?

  • _l_ Wang Pei

    Fuck you

    • your mother cb

      go serve NS then talk la lao cb

      • xcvdf fgg

        serve like a dog, fuck you sinkie. So loyal

    • LOL

      juz to earn some vouchers lols ?

  • sanilim

    Can name it as Our Lau Ah Ma SAP for short lah

  • FUCK WANG PEI

    SG Women, sitting around since 1956, fucking men up who give 30 years of their lives to serve the nation. fuck you wang pei

  • Ayy lmao

    Thank you for your opinion, so when are you serving NS?

    Oh wait you aren’t? Then quit bitching.

  • Pingback: Daily SG: 25 Jul 2014 | The Singapore Daily

  • Daryl Bay

    LOL! Talk is cheap la. Singapore armed forces, soldiers?

    1. Not all are born fit.
    2. Not all trained to be fit
    3. Not all trained to be a soldier
    4. Not Everyone wants to serve the nation- If by choice, given a choice NO FUCK SOUL WILL BE THERE TO EVEN TAKE THE IPPT. thanks. Apart from regulars, they like their job. Then its fine.

    • stockcham lee

      Some “regulars” don’t even love their jobs themselves, they are just in there for the “pay”. Typical jiak liao bees,

  • wahpiangxz

    Don’t spoil market hot please ahma!

  • Lao Ah Pek

    People actually took this post seriously? Wow… no wonder everyone is saying that Singaporeans are stupid.

  • Tsy Sing Yang

    someone post her pic on 9gag so we know :)

  • John

    Chill guys. It’s just a version of the favourite sergeant joke, “My grandmother can run faster than you”.

    • Fuck Wang Pei

      usually the posts are in better taste. this is shit.

  • fucking brainless wang ba dan

    Fuck u bitch

  • Mohd Danial

    50 % real news so other 50% is crap? i doubt it. heheh

  • dysfnctn

    Wang pei? More like Wang Pa Dan.

  • amc

    supposed wang pei is a china name

  • Conscription Time

    Song Bo! SG govt pls see this! This jus proves females can do it too! CONSCRIPT THEM NOW!

  • Muk Weng Sang Roy

    I can’t believe that everyone thinks this article was real. Newnation is satire website. Whatever you read is just jokes making fun of current trending things happening in SG.

  • Soh Chong Yang

    Liar Liar pants on fire!take 2.4Km run for instance.12min run for a 90year old grandma is impossible because Wang Pei grandma would be eligible to run for 42km standard chartered marathon gold medal in her age group Liao.

  • lololol132

    ur mum fucking die la

  • FAKE LHL

    Before say IPPT to hard, change alr say IPPT too easy.
    How to please anyone?

  • Internet-Anonymity Abuser

    Eh retards, this is a satire news site. go chillout with a cup of tea before you have an aneurism.

  • Rachel

    As a girl, I actually find “completed her timed run in 12 minutes flat” offensive considering for us 14 min is A

  • ejjeje

    go die lah author

  • kvdean

    Why not make some increment for passes, silver & gold .
    Pass = $250
    Silver= $500
    Gold= $800

    That part everyone will chiong!!

  • Goo

    Yeah. Guys in Singapore need to get their shit together and stop being pussies.

  • mama ayam

    as if she can run as fast as me _|_ whoever post this is a pussy too. keyboard warrior hide behind the computer screen

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  • Reporter

    This news is a spoof, don’t get serious about it.

  • MC C

    I ve to say that the new 3 stn ippt is only easier to get a pass because it has the point system but not necessary easier to score gold. Honesty, I have to do 58 push-ups in a minute, but it is humanly impossible to do 58 standard push-up under a minute if the chest has to be one fist the distance between the ground each time. Honesty, I challenge any ordinary reservist or trainer to prove me wrong. BTW, this article is a joke

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