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JEM mall collects refund from religious leaders after yet another accident

Posted on 30 November 2013

JEM mall might relocate after glass door shatters, proving poltergeist’s message needs to be heeded.

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JEM mall has collected a full refund from religious leaders on Friday after its latest accident where a glass door shattered into smithereens without apparent rhyme or reason.

However, some eyewitnesses at the scene said a ghostly apparition was seen just when the glass door shattered and a loud shriek could be heard as far as one kilometre away

One eyewitness, Kuah Tio Qwee, said: “Immediately when the glass door shattered, I saw a white figure floating away and heard a loud shriek saying, ‘Why the government not curbing inflation? Everything in here is so expensive, cannot afford anything! GTFO…'”

Religious leaders who were tasked to bless the place after a major September accident in the shopping centre, where a ceiling collapsed spraying urine on everyone in the process, has since given JEM mall a full refund as their anointing did not work.

A JEM mall spokesperson, Kee Sho Peng, said: “The initial warranty, after the religious leaders prayed, covered up to 30 days only, which were supposed to be accident-free days.”

“Luckily we bought AppleCare+ and extended the warranty to 90 days, so we’re getting a full money back guarantee.”

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Wang Pei can be considered a new citizen of Singapore. She has been here all her life, just that her environment's changed beyond recognition.

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