Club called Calm Down Now to be launched

Posted on 29 February 2012

More help to be extended soon for people who are easily outraged.

By The Social Guru

A recent spate of incidents have led Lin Hoh Boh to believe that Singaporeans in general need to count to 10 before accessing Facebook and Twitter to vent their anger.

The 34-year-old acupuncturist and homeopath said that the Remy Ong accident plus the most recent so-called controversy surrounding the Ministry of Community Development, Youth and Sports advertisement displaying the word “Hopeless” in bold are the final straws that broke the back of his camel.

Lin said: “People cannot always get angry about everything. They need to think whether their anger is necessary and whether it can be channelled to other means that are more productive.”

As action speaks louder than birds, Lin was determined to pull together some resources and friends as volunteers who would dispense platitudinous advice and cold wet towels or buckets of ice water on people who come to see them looking and feeling outraged.

But all these serious matters started out with a lighter and heartier objective.

Lin joked that Calm Down Now is a word play on Cum Now, as he and his group of volunteers believe people who get angry easily are also sexually frustrated.

But good common sense got the better of them.

He said: “We thought about it and toyed with the idea for about 40 minutes and worked ourselves into a tizzy getting really excited about our club name that is sexually titillating.

“And then we decided that since Singaporeans are still majority conservative, we should just play safe. But if you read past the normalcy of “Calm Down Now”, you might just get the hint that it was originally supposed to be Cum Now.”

The group intends to register themselves as a society and keep proper records of members.

Membership fees start from $500 a year for regular members to $2,000 for premium members.

Asked whether his rates are a bit too steep, Lin said: “Recently, there was this controversy that led to many NTU graduates feeling outraged about having to pay a lot of money for some convocation thing that they signed without checking the fine print and then complaining it’s too expensive.

“In comparison, our rates are slightly lower, and so I believe, will be acceptable to the public-at-large.”

The perpetual optimist also said: “If you take up the premium membership, you will get to douse outraged people seeking help from us with ice water and one large bucket of dry ice so everyone will get to calm now or cum down!”

This post was written by:

- who has written 2685 posts on New Nation.

Wang Pei can be considered a new citizen of Singapore. She has been here all her life, just that her environment's changed beyond recognition.

Contact the author