Tag Archive | "Tony Tan"

President Tony Tan to personally mend ties with China using his charisma

President Tony Tan to personally mend ties with China using his charisma

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Someone charismatic and brave like him.

tony-tan-china

Singaporeans from all walks of life, who believe that a charismatic and strong-willed leader is necessary for effective governance and negotiations in this increasingly tumultuous world, are looking to President Tony Tan for leadership guidance.

This after it has been increasingly clear that a strong and brave leader, such as Tony Tan, is needed to mend ties between Singapore and China.

One Singaporean, Gan En, said she cannot imagine anyone else filling those shoes like Tony Tan can: “Tony Tan is the only one with the testicular fortitude and charisma to confront a superpower such as China and who has the ability to unite Singaporeans in the face of all adversity.”

“He is a great statesman, elected by the people to solve problems and stand up to any difficulties in our path.”

Other locals said President Tony Tan’s unique capabilities are unmatched in the world arena, as he has unanimously won the popular mandate of Singaporeans to represent the interests of this country and his people.

One other local, See Baey Qiang, said: “The way he speaks and how he carries himself is a hallmark of a natural born leader.”

“He is firm and resolute in his beliefs. He can hold a captive audience with his oratory skills and speak off the cuff, and his mannerisms will make anyone he speaks to feel like they are the centre of his attention.”

“His knowledge of world affairs and power relations are second to none.”

“And when he is tough, his resolve is unlike anything that has been seen before.”

“A true-blue politician with true steel.”

At press time, Singaporeans believe President Tony Tan can handle China by himself.

 

 





Tony Tan to personally bring back 9 Terrexes using presidential powers S’pore gave him

Tony Tan to personally bring back 9 Terrexes using presidential powers S’pore gave him

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With this power, I compel Terrexes return, he said into the night as lightning flashed from the heavens.

tony-tan-confidence-for-the-future

Singaporeans from all walks of life, who are looking at one another with determined faces, are also looking at President Tony Tan with determined faces.

This after they know for sure President Tony Tan looks set to go to China by himself and personally haul back to Singapore the nine Terrex Infantry Carrier Vehicles that were impounded after being seized by China on Nov. 23, 2016.

One Singaporean, Qiang Hui Lai, said: “When Tony Tan ran in the 2011 presidential election, he assured that voting for him was to have confidence for the future.”

“Now is the time for that confidence to materialise.”

“There is no man in Singapore who can lift nine Terrexes with his bare hands than Tony Tan.”

“I heard he can run endlessly for few thousand kilometres and leap tall buildings in a single bound.”

Other locals said they have already started to see a mysterious figure in action running around Singapore throughout the night, looking like it is ready for a mission.

Another local, Bian Fu Xia, said: “I have full faith that Tony Tan will do right by Singaporeans.”

“‘With this power, I compel Terrexes return’, he said into the night as lightning flashed from the heavens.”

“Yes, it is very symbolic because lightning resembles PAP.”

 

 

 

 

 

 





S’poreans console Chee Soon Juan: Chin up, your 39% is better than Tony Tan’s 35.20%

S’poreans console Chee Soon Juan: Chin up, your 39% is better than Tony Tan’s 35.20%

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You did better than the president of Singapore.

chee-better-than-tony-tan

Singaporeans from all walks of life, who believe that the first-past-the-post winner-takes-all electoral system is not the best in the world, are consoling Singapore Democratic Party’s Chee Soon Juan.

This after the sample count for the Bukit Batok by-election announced that Chee had scored 39 percent of votes.

One Singaporean, Da Ying Jia, said Chee should be proud of his result: “Chee Soon Juan, you did better than President Tony Tan. He only won 35.20 percent of votes to become president.”

“You will always be better than Tony Tan in my heart.”

Other Singaporeans said Chee is the real victor having won 39 percent of votes.

Another local, Tou Piao, said: “This result will actually make you an NCMP.”

“You are an NCMP in our hearts.”

 

 

 

 

 





S’poreans react to President Tony Tan’s advice that govt must strive to deserve S’poreans’ trust

S’poreans react to President Tony Tan’s advice that govt must strive to deserve S’poreans’ trust

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Three thoughts that must have went past your mind at some point.

tony-tan-swearing-in

President Tony Tan said on Oct. 1 at he swearing-in of the new Cabinet at the Istana that any election can be potentially divisive but the strong mandate received by the government in General Election 2015 signals that Singaporeans want to stay united.

But he offered the new Cabinet a word of advice: “Singaporeans have chosen to place their trust in you because they believed you were the most worthy of that trust. The trust of the people is a precious thing. It does not come easy. You must continue to strive to deserve that trust.”

Here are three thoughts Singaporeans have:

 

sian-half-auntie “Say other people, say yourself.”
Gong Kah Kee, 44-year-old dispute resolution organiser

 

sian-half-uncle “When Tony Tan won the presidential election, the country was split into four factions. He should know better.”
Bu Gao Xing, 63-year-old board game seller

 

happy-bird-girl “I like how the one who received a weak mandate to lead as president is the one with the most advice to give.”
Zha Ji, 18-year-old fried chicken seller

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 











S’poreans react to President Tony Tan’s advice that govt must strive to deserve people’s trust

S’poreans react to President Tony Tan’s advice that govt must strive to deserve people’s trust

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Three thoughts that must have went past your mind at some point.

tony-tan-swearing-in

President Tony Tan said on Oct. 1 at he swearing-in of the new Cabinet at the Istana that any election can be potentially divisive but the strong mandate received by the government in General Election 2015 signals that Singaporeans want to stay united.

But he offered the new Cabinet a word of advice: “Singaporeans have chosen to place their trust in you because they believed you were the most worthy of that trust. The trust of the people is a precious thing. It does not come easy. You must continue to strive to deserve that trust.”

Here are three thoughts Singaporeans have:

 

sian-half-auntie “Say other people, say yourself.”
Gong Kah Kee, 44-year-old dispute resolution organiser

 

sian-half-uncle “When Tony Tan won the presidential election, the country was split into four factions. He should know better.”
Bu Gao Xing, 63-year-old board game seller

 

happy-bird-girl “I like how the one who received a weak mandate to lead as president is the one with the most advice to give.”
Zha Ji, 18-year-old fried chicken seller

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 











S’poreans react to President Tony Tan thanking NDP participants for ‘hours of dedication’

S’poreans react to President Tony Tan thanking NDP participants for ‘hours of dedication’

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Three thoughts that must have went past your mind at some point.

tony-tan-ndp

President Tony Tan hosted a thank you reception at the Istana on Aug. 19, 2015, for the organisers and participants of this year’s National Day Parade (NDP).

This year’s parade featured more than 7,000 participants.

Here are three thoughts Singaporeans have:

 

sian-half-auntie “‘Thank you’ is easy for you to say since you were there for only two hours.”
Kam Seah, 43-year-old courtesy campaign organiser

 

sian-half-uncle “If he thinks saying ‘thank you’ to everyone else makes up for the fact his security staff stopped a young boy from shaking hands with him, he’s wrong.”
Mai Cham Xiong, 63-year-old debt collector

 

happy-bird-girl “It is not the several thousand participants who thanked President Tony Tan because he obviously didn’t do anything but show up at the parade and look out of place.”
Mei Ren Ai, 17-year-old idealist

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 











Dad in India who named newborn son Lee Kuan Yew was inspired by Tony Tan poster

Dad in India who named newborn son Lee Kuan Yew was inspired by Tony Tan poster

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At press time, none of the other villagers have the heart to tell him the truth.

tony-tan-lee-kuan-yew

An Indian man, who became a father recently, was so moved by tributes to Lee Kuan Yew in his home village in southern India that he decided to name his son Lee Kuan Yew.

The Indian man said: “I saw this big poster in my village featuring a Chinese man with white hair and glasses and he was named Lee Kuan Yew.”

“I heard about all the great things he had done for Singapore and I was very impressed. So I thought ‘Lee Kuan Yew’ would make a nice name for my son.”

However, the poster has since been taken down after it was put up for less than a day and he subsequently heard some of his fellow villagers sniggering but didn’t think too much of it.

The new dad said: “I guess they are just jealous.”

At press time, none of the other villagers have the heart to tell him the truth.

 

Beat this Singaporean tribute to Lee Kuan Yew:

Couple renovates 4-room Punggol HDB flat to look like interior of LKY’s 38 Oxley Road home property

Tony Tan learns to rollerblade

Tony Tan learns to rollerblade

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Sprawling grounds at his place of residence ensures he gets enough practice.

tony-tan-blading

In a bid to make full use of the sprawling premises of his place of residence, Tony Tan has taken up rollerblading.

The 73-year-old has been blading for the past two years, since he moved into the heart of Orchard Road area.

Tan, a semi-retiree, said: “I’ve been having fun. It’s good to know that I have so much free time now. I was more hectic when I had a full-time job.”

His new found passion for blading has him set his sights on larger goals.

He said he ultimately wants to go out of his house by himself, without any of his staff following him around.

His wife, Mrs Tony Tan, however, said: “He whole day like to say he want to go Plaza Singapura by himself, buy 4Fingers eat by himself.”

“Later KFC call and scold him then he know.”

 

 

 

 

Tony Tan fancies the moon to unite S’poreans

Tony Tan fancies the moon to unite S’poreans

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He said he found the full moon “special”.

A week into the worst haze crisis Singapore has ever encountered, President Tony Tan has come out of hiding to address the concerns of the public-at-large.

In a Facebook note, he wrote:

tony-tan-FB

Singaporeans from all walks of life found his Facebook status update uplifting and reassuring.

Yue Liang, a local, said: “Yeah, developing some lunacy seems appropriate. I’m sure that’s what all the everyday people feel as well, what with the lack of masks and a untrustworthy PSI reading.”

There are also others who are glad Tony Tan has updated his Facebook in such a timely manner.

Yuan Yuan, another Singaporean, said: “What would I do without this uplifting Facebook post?”

“And what a great way to unite Singaporeans again.”

Tony Tan’s bryani unites S’poreans

Tony Tan’s bryani unites S’poreans

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Besides bringing them to the yard.

tony-tan-briyani

Singapore’s elected president, Tony Tan, who ran his presidential campaign in 2011 promising to unite Singaporeans if he ever got elected, is sticking to his word.

He is uniting Singaporeans by cooking a giant pot of bryani.

His rice-stirring skills has prompted some locals to applaud his inclusivity.

One pro-establishment Singaporean, Poh Lan Pah, said: “From the way he stirs the rice, you can tell that he is trying to show that Singapore is a melting pot of various ethnicities and cultural practices that can blend well together.”

Others, who are less prone to reading too much into actions of ex-politicians, were quick to point out that Tony Tan is showing that he embraces everyone with an open mind.

Another slightly less status quo-supporting Singaporean, Mei Li Yew said: “By standing next to Yaacob Ibrahim, Tony Tan is showing that he is tolerant of idiots.”

Tony Tan recently went to Brunei. His visit has been construed as uniting Singaporeans. As well.

President Tony Tan to visit Brunei to unite S’poreans

President Tony Tan to visit Brunei to unite S’poreans

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Everything he does is to unite Singaporeans.

tony-tan

President Tony Tan will be visiting Brunei on Tuesday for three days, his first state visit there since becoming president in 2011.

This visit is significant as Tony Tan campaigned during the presidential election two years ago saying that he will be a figurehead who will unite Singaporeans if he wins.

Singaporeans from all walks of life agree.

Lai Tuan Jie, a young Singaporean who spoiled his vote during the presidential election said: “Yes, there is no doubt Tony Tan will unite Singaporeans when he goes to Brunei and does some important things like talk and walk around.”

“We will all hold hands for those three days and be inspired.”

The Foreign Affairs Ministry has said Dr Tan will receive a ceremonial welcome at Istana Nurul Iman, the Sultan’s official residence.

He will then have a meeting with the Sultan, and be hosted to a state banquet in the evening.

And then he will fly back.

Another Singaporean, Yi Qi Lai, said: “When Tony Tan comes back to Singapore, we will be united as one big country.”

“We will all hold hands and feel so unity.”

Tony Tan’s vinyl election campaign banners turned into tote bags

Tony Tan’s vinyl election campaign banners turned into tote bags

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Charles & Keith is responsible.

By Belmont Lay

For $59.90, you could own a tote bag that is also an ex-Tony Tan vinyl election campaign banner.

Some of you should be acutely aware by now that we here at New Nation love to play favourites.

Yes, I have stated pretty openly in the past before the August Presidential Election that I will never vote for Tony Tan.

But look, even though I might not fancy Tony as president, that doesn’t stop me from supporting the latest cause that has his campaign team involved.

With a bit of ingenuity and string-pulling, Charles & Keith, the footwear maker and retailer teamed up with Tony’s campaign team to “upcycle” used vinyl presidential election campaign banners and turn them into tote bags that retail for $59.90 each.

Yes, you heard me right. Vinyl election banners you saw hung up in August are being turned into bags. And why only Tony’s team and not the rest? If you’ve got five minutes of your life to spare, you might want to drop Charles & Keith an email to ask about it.

And according to the press release which I’m referring to while banging out this piece, each tote bag comes with “slight imperfections” so each piece is “unique”.

I believe this should be euphemism for something. If you are smart and rich enough to afford a tote bag, you should be able to work it out for yourselves.

But here’s the upside: The UN Women Singapore is also in on this as part of the sale proceeds of the bag go to them.

How much exactly will be donated to UN Women?

Well, beats the heck out of me. Doesn’t say in the press release. It could be 5 cents, it could be a dollar.

Maybe you’d like to ask the lady at the counter in the shop when you do decide to buy one.

For the record, I am for women being independent, schooled, financially numerate and having a greater access and ability to accumulate fungible resources so that they never have to feel indebted to us, stinky and slimy men, for a living.

I owe this line of thinking to that one sociology module on gender I took in university as well as to the advocacy of my favourite but recently-deceased humanist author Christopher Hitchens, who always proposed raising the lot of women to raise the lot of society.

And how does a bag made from vinyl campaign banners look like? It looks like what is pictured above.

The exterior resembles a normal bag and it is supposed to be “minimalistic duo-tone”. But maybe when you open it up, some bags might have Tony’s face peaking out from inside it or his signature campaign spectacles logo on a purple background.

I haven’t got a clue. I haven’t had my hands on one.

But do I think it looks good? Should this be reported to the fashion police? I haven’t got a freaking clue either.

You might be better off asking Stevie Wonder. You have until end of December.

The last time we at NN were banging on about helping women raise their lot was the UNIFEM Buy to Save two-day event on Dec. 3 & 4. Read about it here.

Bukit Brown argument as exciting as soccer

Bukit Brown argument as exciting as soccer

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Advocates for and against the destruction of Bukit Brown dribble their way around the same facts. Plus, expert tips on odds and winner prediction!

You will not believe whose grandfather's tomb (pictured above) is in the way of the proposed land development that could save Bukit Brown from destruction. Hint: His name rhymes with "Phoney Fun".

In as early as late May, when Bukit Brown was earmarked for housing development, advocates for and against the destruction of the cemetery were shooting off opinionated missives to the press and across the Interweb to make a case.

On Sept. 12, the Land Transport Authority announced that 5,000 out of 100,000 graves in Bukit Brown will be no more because they are going to build a road through it come 2013, whether you liked it or not.

And the ferocity of the missives from both camps intensified.

But if you’re lost in the crossfire, no worries. Read the full story

Blur photos are the next passé

Blur photos are the next passé

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Coming soon: A feature on Photoshop that allows you to unblur photos.

Adobe has bravely heralded the end of blurred photos in their website. Now to most of you posers who can afford to tote a DSLR, this probably doesn’t really matter. But for mortals like the rest of us who can only afford a crappy Samsung smartphone (not even an iPhone), this marks the start of a revolution in amateur photography.

According to Adobe, “advanced algorithms calculate the movements of the camera at the time the image was taken, enabling the user to ‘fix’ the image by unblurring it – saving what would ordinarily be a disappointing, dud image.”

Most importantly, “the process can be used on a photo captured on a mobile device to sharpen the quality and, in the case of text-based images, reveal more data.”

Now because they haven’t released the product yet, we can’t do a demo for you. But here’s a clip of the press conference.

Now before you start getting all giddy with the possibilities of having a cheapass cam now, here’s another cool photoshop feature that’s already available – Content Aware.

Let’s take a picture of the parliament yesterday:

Parliament in session with Tony Tan at the helm

Let’s say I voted for Tan Cheng Bock in the recent elections:

Tony Tan is... The Invisible Man

Siao eh! No more Tony Tan! And the programme’s smart enough to fill up some colour behind too. But wait, there’s still that annoying little white outline. Click on the “healing brush”:

Empty seat! But warped space-time continuity in the presidential seat. How???

Ta daa! Now the chair’s empty with a slightly weird looking warp where the president’s elbow used to be. But nevermind, that’s easily fixed with some cover up. Someone’s got to be in that seat during parliament right? Let’s pick someone cooler.

Coolest president to chair parliament

And there we go – Tay Ping Hui chairs his first Parliamentary session.

CoolCoolCoolCoolCool????

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