Tag Archive | "riot"

S’pore researcher discovers expensive alcohol contains crucial anti-rioting properties

S’pore researcher discovers expensive alcohol contains crucial anti-rioting properties

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Different kinds of alcohol likely to cause different types of reaction.

Top photo stolen from here

Top photo stolen from here

A top Singapore researcher has made a startling discovery yesterday.

He found that expensive alcohol and cheap alcohol consist of different chemical properties, which will lead to drinkers behaving differently.

Head researcher, Dr Lim Kar Tor, said rich people drink a different kind of alcohol from poor people, and as a result, the type of alcohol determines behaviour: “Rich people drink expensive alcohol that contains crucial anti-rioting properties, while poor people drink cheap alcohol that causes them to run riot.”

When asked to name the anti-rioting properties, Dr Lim elaborated that it is actually two substances called “wealth” and “opportunity” found only in expensive alcohol, which makes a difference in the reactions of drinkers: “You can find these properties called ‘wealth’ and ‘opportunity’ only in expensive alcohol. Once you’ve consumed enough of it, you wouldn’t be upset with your lot in life.”

“However, even if you are upset about your lot in life, ‘wealth’ and ‘opportunity’ will enable you to cry about your situation on a yacht or in a car with a pretty girl on your lap, which will help make things better, faster.”

“Therefore, cheap alcohol without ‘wealth’ and ‘opportunity’ inside, will cause rioting.”

Alcohol failed to cause riot at Clark Quay this weekend

Alcohol failed to cause riot at Clark Quay this weekend

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Authorities not sure what went right.

clark-quay

Authorities grappling for answers as to why the Little India riot occurred last Sunday were left even more puzzled as watering hole Clark Quay did not experience a similar incident this weekend.

This despite having all the elements there at one place to start the most proper and epic riot.

An official spokesperson, Tiew Tong Xi, said: “All the contributing factors present in Little India last weekend were similarly available in Clark Quay this weekend: People, alcohol and dustbins for tossing.”

“But nothing happened.”

Singaporeans from all walks of life have also expressed their amazement that Clark Quay was not ground zero given that there are more drunks there and alcohol is way overpriced.

Lim Kah Tor, a local said: “A bottle of beer for $12? I’m surprised no one has started a fight over that yet.”

Be wary of nice sounding explanations about British riots

Be wary of nice sounding explanations about British riots

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The more thorough the explanations seem, the more you need to roll your eyes and disbelieve it.

By Belmont Lay

Jonathan Eyal's special report in The Sunday Times on Aug. 14 ran the gamut of explanations for the British riots. Result? When the cause of event is unknown or non-existent, it is easy to invest political meaning into it.

Wanton destruction. Widespread looting. Deep social disease.

Yes, Britain has gone to the dogs.

Well, at least according to Jonathan Eyal, who is The Straits Times Europe Correspondent writing in The Sunday Times special report this week (pages 20 and 21).

So what exactly did he propose was the cause of all these mayhem with regards to the recent riots in Britain?

In precise order, this was pretty much what he stated: Police brutality. Poverty. Welfare state. Culture of entitlement. Single mothers. Teenage pregnancy. Absent fathers. Truancy. Illiteracy. Read the full story

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