Tag Archive | "parliament"

PM Lee extremely touched by own speech in Parliament

PM Lee extremely touched by own speech in Parliament

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That was a good speech, he thought.

pm-lee-touched-speech

Prime Minister Lee Hsien Loong, who had to spend two days convincing Singaporeans he is not evil, looked himself in the mirror and nodded with pride after Parliament was over and he was home alone.

This after he gave a Ministerial Statement in Parliament and was moved to tears by the force of his own rhetoric, crispness of his diction, insight into the plight of Singaporeans and overwhelming fevour of his own conviction to right all wrongs in Singapore society.

PM Lee was thought to have thought to himself: “I spoke with a conviction I never felt since I got elected during GE2015 in September 2015.”

“I was extremely touched by the sound of my voice and the position I espouse. I believe Singaporeans from all walks of life will hear my speech and weep as I have wept, as I was really, really moved.”

PM Lee also thought to himself that he did extremely well and have moved even himself to do soul-searching in the aftermath of his words having been spoken.

PM Lee was believed to have thought: “This speech will convince all my naysayers that I have so much substance and belief.”

“I nailed it completely. The electorate made the right decision giving me this strong mandate. This will make me a superstar praised by the Internet and social media people.”

At press time, Singaporeans from all walks of life were not aware parliament is over.

 

 





Geography study: S’pore Parliament is country’s biggest echo chamber

Geography study: S’pore Parliament is country’s biggest echo chamber

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Filled with hot air.

singapore-13th-parliament

Singaporeans from all walks of life, who enjoy learning about their urban environment, are in awe of a special physical artifact in Singapore that has been hidden in plain sight all this while.

This after they learnt that the Parliament in Singapore is the country’s biggest echo chamber, owing to the fact that any sounds in there get reverberated all around repeatedly, so that anyone inside keeps hearing the same thing, a recent geography study found.

One Singaporean, Jin Tua Seah, said: “You can really hear the reverb in this place.”

“Really got this very hollow sound even when you speak casually. Can keep hearing the same thing over and over again, bouncing off the roof and the floor and off anyone’s face when they sit in there.”

“It is almost as if everyone agrees with you.”

Other locals said the echo chamber is also very airy.

Another local, Jin Shio, said: “The moment you walk in you can feel the hot air rising.”

“The warm air really keeps the echo reverberating, filling the place with extra molecules and making the atmosphere dense.”

“Due to these factors, it’s like singing in the shower, which makes anyone sound really good.”

“This place is so big yet hollow.”

 

 





PAP MPs applaud one another for wasting 2 days but still got paid

PAP MPs applaud one another for wasting 2 days but still got paid

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Well-played.

mps-applaud

Singaporeans from all walks of life, who know how economics work, are clapping their hands and cheering PAP MPs in Parliament for a game well-played.

This after 83 PAP MPs spent two days in Parliament on July 3 and 4 not doing much but still got paid.

One Singaporean, Jiak Zhua, said: “This has to be the best sort of job ever. Show up, breathe, don’t die and end of the month the money still credited in the bank account.”

“What a well-played game.”

Other locals said the PAP MPs could have spent the two days sitting around an air-conditioned room and not do anything and no one will notice because this is usually what happens.

Another local, Jiak Leow Bee, said: “If the PAP MPs did not applaud one another, they still would have given Prime Minister Lee Hsien Loong a standing ovation for a job well done.”

“Nothing got done but it looks like a lot of effort put in.”

“Now can go back to normal again.”

At press time, Singaporeans are camping out at Lee Hsien Yang’s Facebook page.

 

 





PAP MPs to praise PM Lee’s achievements during July 3 Parliament about Lee family feud

PAP MPs to praise PM Lee’s achievements during July 3 Parliament about Lee family feud

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They seek to give him validation.

pap-mp-ask-hard-question

Singaporeans from a particular walk of life, as they are PAP MPs from the elite establishment, are sweating.

This is so as they are writing long parliament speeches to praise Prime Minister Lee Hsien Loong.

This after PM Lee said he will be giving a Ministerial Statement on July 3 and all MPs are invited to ask tough questions but they will use this opportunity to praise their boss instead.

One Singaporean, Jiang Hao Hua, said: “This is a test by the boss for his subordinates. Those who really on that day ask tough questions, will just get fired.”

“Those who are smart, will show up that day well-prepared to praise PM Lee for his hard work and contributions to Singapore.”

Other locals said PAP MPs who do ask hard questions are probably the politically immature.

Another local, Xian Shi, said: “You need to be realistic. Where got subordinates question their boss in public and expect to get away scot-free.”

“Do you think this is a democracy?”

 

 





MPs extremely moved by their own speeches in Parliament

MPs extremely moved by their own speeches in Parliament

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They were impressed by themselves, many thought to and about themselves.

vivian-balakrishnan-parliament

Numerous Members of Parliament from some walks of life, because they mainly come from the PAP who take up such a large chunk of Parliament, are feeling very moved and touched.

This after they each gave a speech in Parliament for the Budget debate and were moved to tears by the force of their own rhetoric, crispness of their diction, insight into the plight of the suffering and overwhelming fevour of their own conviction to right all wrongs in Singapore society.

One PAP MP was thought to have thought to himself: “I spoke with a conviction I never felt since I got elected during GE2015 in September 2015.”

“I was extremely touched by the sound of my voice and the position I espouse. I believe Singaporeans from all walks of life will hear my speech and weep as I have wept, as I was really, really moved.”

Other MPs were reported to have thought to themselves that they too did extremely well and have moved even themselves to do soul-searching in the aftermath of their words having been spoken.

Another MP from the ruling party, was believed to have thought: “This speech will convince all my naysayers that I have so much substance and belief.”

“I nailed it completely. The electorate made the right decision giving me this strong mandate. This will make me a superstar MP praised by the Internet and social media people.”

“I have so much belief and so much to give. It’s amazing.”

At press time, Singaporeans from all walks of life were not aware parliament was in session.

 

 

 

 

 





Chee Soon Juan to personally point out which PAP MPs fall asleep in Parliament if elected

Chee Soon Juan to personally point out which PAP MPs fall asleep in Parliament if elected

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He will also call up absentees one by one and take their attendance.

chee-soon-juan-family

Singaporeans from all walks of life, who believe in checks and balances, are nodding their heads in approval.

This after the upcoming Bukit Batok by-election hustings revealed that Singapore Democratic Party candidate Chee Soon Juan has pledged to personally point out which PAP MPs fall asleep in Parliament, if he is elected.

One resident, Pong Tang, said she is heartened by his action plan: “If he sees a PAP MP sleeping, he will go over with an alarm clock and set it off.”

“He will also check the nominal roll and point out which PAP MPs are absent in Parliament and give them a call: ‘Hello? Where are you? Do you know parliament is in session today?'”

“And if the PAP MPs take too long to reassemble after the break in parliament sessions, he will go out to the pantry area and personally usher all the PAP MPs back inside to their seats individually.”

“This is to ensure no PAP MPs will ever miss attending Parliament ever again.”

Other residents said having a formal attendance-taker in Parliament bodes well for democracy.

Another Singaporean, Zhen Zhi, said: “Not only will Chee Soon Juan take their attendance, he will call them in advance to notify them about the Parliament seating so there is no longer any excuse to be absent.”

“Without this sort of checks and balances, PAP MPs might be inclined to be part-time MPs, which is not worth taxpayers’ money.”

 

 

 

 

 





MPs extremely touched by their own speech in Parliament

MPs extremely touched by their own speech in Parliament

Tags: , , ,


They were impressed by themselves, many thought to and about themselves.

darryl-david-pap-mp

Numerous Members of Parliament from some walks of life, because they mainly come from the PAP who take up such a large chunk of Parliament, are feeling very moved and touched.

This after they each gave a speech in Parliament for the Budget debate and were moved to tears by the force of their own rhetoric, crispness of their diction, insight into the plight of the suffering and overwhelming fevour of their own conviction to right all wrongs in Singapore society.

One PAP MP was thought to have thought to himself: “I spoke with a conviction I never felt since I got elected during GE2015 last September 2015.”

“I was extremely touched by the sound of my voice and the position I espouse. I believe Singaporeans from all walks of life will hear my speech and weep as I have wept, as I was really, really moved.”

Other MPs were reported to have thought to themselves that they too did extremely well and have moved even themselves to do soul-searching in the aftermath of their words having been spoken.

Another MP from the ruling party, was believed to have thought: “This speech will convince all my naysayers that I have so much substance and belief.”

“I nailed it completely. The electorate made the right decision giving me this strong mandate. This will make me a superstar MP praised by the Internet and social media people.”

“I have so much belief and so much to give. It’s amazing.”

At press time, Singaporeans from all walks of life were not aware parliament was in session.

 

 

 

 

 





S’poreans intimidated when Home Affairs Minister firmly said police not intimidating

S’poreans intimidated when Home Affairs Minister firmly said police not intimidating

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It was the way he said it, they said.

k-shanmugam-in-parliament

Singaporeans from all walks of life, who can be convinced by arguments without being bludgeoned with facts and style of rhetoric, said they feel intimidated.

This after they heard Home Affairs Minister K Shanmugam speak in parliament rebutting the claims that the police might have been somewhat responsible for the passing of a teenager as they were intimidating.

One Singaporean, Hai Pah, said: “The minister asserted himself via his long speech in parliament that the police were not intimidating and acted reasonably.”

“But it was just the way he said it. It came off quite intimidating, like assertive, firm and too convincing, the way he defended the police.”

“It was like he came to parliament with a long sheet filled with facts and was prepared to demolish all dissenting voices to the ground because he knew exactly what the talking points were and how to set the agenda.”

“And he had all his points ready to rebut any doubt anyone possessed.”

“He spoke in such a sure, calm and forceful manner, there was no way you could disagree.”

“That was pretty scary.”

 

 

 

 

 











MPs touched, extremely moved by their own speech in Parliament

MPs touched, extremely moved by their own speech in Parliament

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They were impressed by themselves, many thought to and about themselves.

desmond-choo-parliament

Numerous Members of Parliament from some walks of life, because they mainly come from the PAP who take up such a large chunk of Parliament, are feeling very moved and touched.

This after they each gave a speech in Parliament and were moved to tears by the force of their own rhetoric, crispness of their diction, insight into the plight of the suffering and overwhelming fevour of their own conviction to right all wrongs in Singapore society.

One PAP MP was thought to have thought to himself: “I spoke with a conviction I never felt since I got elected during GE2015 last September 2015.”

“I was extremely touched by the sound of my voice and the position I espouse. I believe Singaporeans from all walks of life will hear my speech and weep as I have wept, as I was really, really moved.”

Other MPs were reported to have thought to themselves that they too did extremely well and have moved many others to do soul-searching in the aftermath of their words having been spoken.

Another MP from the ruling party, was believed to have thought: “This speech will convince all my naysayers that I have so much substance and belief.”

“I nailed it completely. The electorate made the right decision giving me this strong mandate. This will make me a superstar MP praised by the Internet and social media people.”

“I have so much belief and so much to give. It’s amazing.”

At press time, Singaporeans from all walks of life were not aware parliament was in session.

 

 

 

 

 











Change S’pore’s political system to allow more Chinese men from PAP into Parliament

Change S’pore’s political system to allow more Chinese men from PAP into Parliament

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Not enough Chinese men from PAP in Parliament now.

singapore-13th-parliament

Photo stolen from here

Singaporeans from all walks of life, who believe equal representation is important in society because it is the politically correct thing to say, are applauding President Tony Tan.

This after President Tony Tan revealed during his parliament address that the Government will study Singapore’s political system this coming term for possible reforms.

One Singaporean, Tng Lang, said the reforms should be aimed at having more Chinese men in Parliament: “Singapore can make do with more Chinese men in Parliament. Currently, there are not enough Chinese men, especially those from the PAP.”

“In fact, if we look closely, we can only see one-third of Parliament being occupied by Chinese men from the PAP who are Christian.”

“Hence, more needs to be done to increase this quota.”

Other Singaporeans said the GRC system must be tweaked to make them bigger, so as to better encourage opposition parties from contesting in elections and losing bigger time.

Besides electoral politics, other locals said the elected presidency must be re-crafted in such a way as to always elect a candidate that the PAP endorses.

Singaporeans, by and large, also agree that women can play a bigger role in parliamentary politics or elect a women prime minister in the future, but the time for those changes will only be ripe once Singapore is done arguing with itself if a non-Chinese person can ever become prime minister one day.

At press time, Singaporeans are confident those reforms that can come to pass, due to PAP’s two-third majority, will come to pass.

 

 

 

 

 











S’poreans react to President Tony Tan’s 13th parliament address after swearing in session

S’poreans react to President Tony Tan’s 13th parliament address after swearing in session

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Three thoughts that must have went past your mind at some point.

tony-tan-parliament-address

President Tony Tan delivered his opening address to Parliament on Jan. 15, 2016, hours after 89 Members of Parliament (MPs) and two Non-Constituency MPs (NCMPs) were sworn in.

In his opening address, he outlined five key aims for Government to fulfil: Keeping Singapore safe and secure, renewing the economy, fostering a more caring society, transforming the urban landscape, and engaging and partnering with Singaporeans in nation building.

Here are three thoughts Singaporeans have:

 

sian-half-auntie “That has got to be one of the most expensive speeches of all time.”
Jiang Niao Hua, 43-year-old pet shop owner

 

sian-half-uncle “Nice to see he met his KPI this year so early on already.”
Zhuan Da Qian, 63-year-old ex-banker

 

happy-bird-girl “I am impressed he doesn’t put himself to sleep at the rate he is going.”
Swee Jiao, 17-year-old dropout

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 











S’poreans react to PM Lee calling opposition a mouse in Parliament

S’poreans react to PM Lee calling opposition a mouse in Parliament

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Three thoughts that must have went past your mind at some point.

opposition-mouse-PM-Lee

Prime Minister Lee Hsien Loong said on Sept. 1 that the opposition in parliament has put in a disappointing performance even though they were voted in to be a tiger in a chamber, but ended up being a “mouse in the House”.

PM Lee, the party’s secretary-general, said it was “very easy” to make fierce and rousing speeches at election rallies, where candidates can promise to do things if elected but none of those issues are raised when they come to Parliament.

Here are three thoughts Singaporeans have:

 

sian-half-auntie “If the opposition is a mouse, then East Coast GRC MP Raymond Lim was a dead mouse the last four years.”
Ya Pah, 45-year-old speech therapist

 

sian-half-uncle “Having a few mice in parliament really helps break up the monotony of a room full of swines.”
Zhu Ba Jie, 62-year-old butcher

 

happy-bird-girl “PAP MPs didn’t give rousing election speeches, which explain why they aren’t even mice. They are potatoes.”
Mah Ling Su, 17-year-old fast food service staff

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 











S’poreans react to news that Parliament has been dissolved

S’poreans react to news that Parliament has been dissolved

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Three thoughts that must have went past your mind at some point.

parliament-singapore

President Tony Tan Keng Yam, on the advice of Prime Minister Lee Hsien Loong, on Tuesday Aug. 25 dissolved Singapore’s 12th Parliament.

This means that the General Election will be held on Sept. 11.

Here are three thoughts Singaporeans have:

 

sian-half-auntie “Election is here? Didn’t notice.”
Mei Kan Dao, 43-year-old optician

 

sian-half-uncle “They should also dissolve the MPs.”
Liu Chu Lai, 65-year-old waste disposal manager

 

happy-bird-girl “So now PM Lee Hsien Loong is Civilian Lee Hsien Loong?”
Lee Zhong Li, 17-year-old student

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 











S’poreans react to PAP’s claim that opposition in parliament had no bearing on PAP policies

S’poreans react to PAP’s claim that opposition in parliament had no bearing on PAP policies

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Three thoughts that must have went past your mind at some point.

opposition-parliament-policies

Deputy Prime Minister Teo Chee Hean has downplayed the role of having opposition in parliament.

He said that they do not have bearing on the carrying out or refining of policies, as PAP is solely responsible for these plans.

Here are three thoughts Singaporeans have:

 

sian-half-auntie “It is true because all the problems Singaporeans suffer from daily are a result of PAP’s doing and policies.”
Kuai Ren Chuo, 44-year-old button maker

 

sian-half-uncle “Most PAP MPs also do not have a bearing on PAP policies because they don’t speak up or show up in parliament anyways.”
Qu Na Li, 65-year-old taxi driver

 

happy-bird-girl “Simple. Lesser the opposition in parliament, the lesser the bearing. More opposition in parliament, the more the bearing.”
Jiang Dao Lee, 18-year-old bursary recipient

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 











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