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New opposition political party, Third Party, vows to bring PAP to its knees

New opposition political party, Third Party, vows to bring PAP to its knees

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They are here to steal PAP’s lunch.

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Unveiling their minimalistic black and white logo at their party headquarters in Joo Chiat, Third Party, Singapore’s newest political party to register, told the media at a press conference they are here to create change and know exactly what it takes to steal the incumbent’s lunch.

Third Party’s Secretary-General, Gao Wai Yu, said: “I will prove to Singaporeans that Third Party is a fierce rival that will steal the hearts of Singaporeans and bring PAP to its knees.”

Explaining the party’s choice of logo, party treasurer Nao Lee Hoon, said: “As you can see, our party logo is very symbolic: It consists of black and white, signalling the usual two sides of the divide. And then there is the grey area, which is the third side.”

“Very appropriate for a party called Third Party.”

“On a more serious note, we are called Third Party for two reasons, which Singaporeans are already familiar with.”

“Firstly, it is because there have traditionally been two main parties in Singapore: The PAP and Workers’ Party.”

“So, Third Party aims to be the third party that is of consequence in Singapore politics.”

“And naturally also because we know that third parties have so far been the downfall of PAP MPs.”

“So, we want to bring PAP to its knees, on its back, on all fours, on their side, hands behind their back and what have you.”

Besides outlining how the party envisions their entry into the lives of the PAP, the secretary-general also said that they will be focusing on recruiting new members for Third Party around their headquarters.

These new recruits can be volunteers or card-carrying members, but they will mostly come from the Joo Chiat area and will be formally called “Third Parties”.

Fen Cai Chan, a new recruit of Third Party and recent naturalised citizen from Vietnam, said: “Joo Chiat will be our home ground from now on. We have looked at many different locales to set up our HQ, but we felt this turf is ripe to recruit members as many of the constituents here already know a thing or two about what it takes to be a ‘Third Party’.”

Singaporeans from all walks of life, who have always appreciated high-octane action and watching Korean drama series, are smiling broadly and clapping their hands in glee as they said Third Party’s entry into the political arena spells trouble for PAP.

One Singaporean, Kwa Hee, said as he put on his sunglasses and The Who came on: “The PAP will have a hard time resisting the advances of this Third Party.”

“Yeeeeeeah.”

 

 

 

 

 

 





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