Tag Archive | "Al-Qaeda"

Singa the Lion joins Al-Qaeda

Singa the Lion joins Al-Qaeda

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From courtesy to global terrorism, mascot has had it with humanity.

lion

Singa the Lion, Singapore’s ex-mascot for courtesy, has joined terrorist network Al-Qaeda.

In a high-profile resignation yesterday that went viral, he wrote in his letter that was tendered to the Singspore Kindness Movement: “I’m just too tired to continue facing an increasingly angry and disagreeable society.”

No mention was made of where he was headed to next or what he intended to do.

However, his resignation and immediate entry into a global terrorist network was not surprising.

Self-styled political pundit Eric de Yaya, said this adverse reaction is a result of losing faith in humanity: “At the end of the day, he’s a lion, a beast. At the core, he just wants to rape and pillage if given the chance.”

His resolve, though, is being questioned.

Members of the public interviewed said Singa will come crawling back, showing that he is a pussy rather than lion-hearted.

Mei Li Mao, a Singaporean, said: “Good luck to him moving into the mountains. After so many years in Singapore, he won’t stand a chance without modern conveniences.”

World’s worst baddies (dead and alive)

World’s worst baddies (dead and alive)

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These days, death is a fashionable must-have for dictators/terrorists/megalomaniacs of all sorts.

By Terence Lee

Darth Vader. Doctor Evil. Voldemort. Fiction and Hollywood are filled with great villains, but all of them pale in comparison to the real-life monsters we have in our midst. Together, these individuals are responsible for countless wars, and millions upon millions of innocent lives lost.

While some are captured and killed, others remain scot-free. Here, we take a short trip down memory lane and present you a totally unauthoritative list of the most evil villians ever.

#6 Muammar Gaddafi

If there’s an award for World’s Ugliest Baddie, he deserves it. Frog-faced Gaddafi was the autocratic ruler of Libya for over 40 years. His star power rose after he massacred thousands of civilians when they demanded that he step down from power.

His stubbornness and borderline insanity led to a civil war which lasted for months, and he has shown himself to be ruthless when it comes to putting civilians in harm’s way. He came perilously close to routing the rebels, but NATO’s intervention turned the tide of battle. Most recently, the rebels have reported that Gaddafi was shot and killed while trying to escape in a four-car convoy.

But while he scores points for his peacock-like fashion sense (probably compensating for his ugly face), he’s a noob when it comes to the PhD of villiany. His war with the rebels lasted for only a few months, and he was stupid for not escaping to neighboring countries when he had the chance. US President Obama must be really pleased.

#5 Kim Jong Il

Kim: "Can my cucumber be as big as this?"

Little known fact: Kim’s birth name was actually Yuri Irsenovich Kim. But more popularily known as Kim Jong Il, this shortie is a God amongst men. Revered as the Great Leader, he commands the respect of his brainwashed citizens, many of whom sing patriotic songs praising the Motherland.

This dude is ruthless. He commands the fourth largest standing army in the world, is ranked the 31st most powerful person by Forbes in 2010. He has no qualms about eliminating political rivals that stand in his way.

His propaganda is so potent that some North Koreans supposedly believe that he has a magical ability to change the weather. They even think that Kim is a global fashionista whose attire has set trends around the world. While that is a bit far out, he is somewhat of a cultural phenomena, having inspired a humor site and a YouTube video.

While he is very good at staying in power, he doesn’t have a lot of villainous deeds to be proud. He has a lot of bite but no bark. While he is good at hanging on to power, he did not start a war.

Unlike the next dude.

#4 Osama Bin Laden

The first virgin.

Ten years. That was how long it took to capture and kill him. His most famous act was of course 9/11, where he killed thousands of Americans. He was also the catalyst for two wars, one in Afghanistan and the other in Iraq. As the leader of terrorist network Al-Qaeda, he had a US$25 million bounty on his head —  enough to make 25 people millionaires.

Raised as a devout Muslim, he attended an elite theological school and may have even earned a degree of two. The brainy turbanator also did charity, enjoyed reading and writing poetry. He even plays soccer and was said to be a fan of Arsenal FC. New Nation spoke to a club spokesperson, and they won’t admit anything.

His crowning achievement, of course, was Al-Qaeda. He started the group in 1988, and slowly developed their version of jihad where the killing of innocent lives was permissible. He was responsible or involved in many terrorist operations throughout the 90s, which would become training exercises for the destruction of the Twin Towers.

But that singular act also proved to be his greatest downfall. Since he went for the jugular, Americans were outraged. They struck back, invaded Afghanistan, and sent Osama fleeing into the mountains. As brainy as he was, he failed to see that killing 1,000 people in 10 separate operations was much safer than killing 1,000 at once. And while he was foxy enough to evade capture for a decade, Obama eventually got Osama, found a stash of porn in his house, and discovered that he had a crush on Condoleezza Rice.

#3 Saddam Hussein

In the Facebook age, Saddam has been quickly forgotten. But as the former president of Iraq, he was responsible for the death of over 200,000 Kurdish people and other minorities. The mass killings happened from 1986 to 1989 as a decisive campaign against insurgency. Poison gas was used in cities, causing thousands of deaths. Many men accused of being rebels were sent to concentration camps where they faced the firing squad.

His hold on power, however, ended in 2003 when then US President George W. Bush invaded Iraq. He was eventually captured later the same year, tried in 2004, and executed in 2006 by hanging.

#2 George W. Bush

Seriously, you can’t get any more badass than former American President George W. Bush. This dude is directly or indirectly responsible for the deaths of two of his rival villians (Saddam and Osama). And while many credit President Obama for killing Osama, you cannot ignore the painstaking intelligence work that was conducted during Bush’s time.

He invented an excuse to get rid of Saddam, telling the whole world that Iraq had Weapons of Mass Destruction, ie the Nuclear Bomb. As if to prove his macho-ness, he invaded Iraq without telling the other world leaders, effectively showing them the middle finger. And guess what? No nuclear devices were found. Zilch. Nada. And the World Leader was left red-faced.

He effectively sent thousands of patriotic American troops to a totally unnecessary war, causing unneeded casualties, widowed women, and fatherless children.

Either he was incredibly stupid, or hungry for oil.

And while he was busy inspecting troops in foreign lands, the US economy was suffering. A classic misstep: He instituted tax cuts while spending trillions of dollars on two war fronts.

But are his exploits enough to place him in the number two spot? Yes, because he got away scot free. He eased off into retirement, writing books and giving speeches. Only in the Land of the Free can that happen.

#1 Adolf Hitler

As evil (and clueless) as George Bush was, even he cannot match most devious character in human history — Adolf Hitler. Not much needs to be said about him, because plenty is  known. He wiped out 6 million Jews off the face of the Planet (and probably 10 Einsteins amongst them). Indirectly, he was responsible for killing over 60 million people, just for starting World War 2.

But if you think that’s the total extent of his impact, you’re wrong. While killing of Jews was horrifying in itself, it resulted in a revolt against Anti-Semitism which eventually led to the creation of the state of Israel.

His legacy is still evident today. On YouTube, he’s the inspiration behind countless parody videos, which altogether accumulated billions of pageviews.

Also, no sane parent would ever name their children ‘Adolf’ or ‘Hitler’.

That is why he is the number one baddie of all time.

Image credits: iluvuflickr, Marion Doss, Amir Farshad Ebrahimi

9/11 freaked me out

9/11 freaked me out

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But I never really comprehended the full impact of it. Until a few days ago.

By Belmont Lay

Just last week, when the New Nation editors had to sit down and talk about doing a a little tribute piece about where we were and what we were experiencing when 9/11 occurred 10 years ago, it didn’t take a lot out of me to go back in time in my mind to dig up the details.

And this very fact about how much I can still recall surprised me.

I think it says a lot that I can still remember that Sept. 11, 2001 fell on a Tuesday – without having to delve too deeply into my memory.

I was 17, pimply and awkward and I was in the first year of junior college. It was September, which meant I was trying to wrap my head around my economics homework.

News of 9/11 came to me close to midnight when I was discharging my nightly obligation of surfing free-to-air channels while homeworking (broadband Internet then, I must add, was a wet dream that was not fulfilled yet).

Footage on Channel News Asia that night was strangely transfixed on a very tall building in New York, as television viewers were informed that there had been an explosion of sorts.

I knew right then something was up.

Or rather, with my poorly developed instincts and a complete inability to grasp the significance of what was unfolding before me then, I, in fact, failed to guess that some things were soon going to come crashing down.

The following day in class, blurry-eyed and a little disturbed having stayed up until 3 a.m. and still not understanding what exactly happened, our Economics tutor was business-as-usual.

No talking about what happened. No point harping over fallen buildings. We have a year-end exam coming up, remember? Let’s dive in, and draw a curve showing how interest rates affects money supply.

That really annoyed me on two fronts:

1) I know my cat didn’t get killed tragically or my parents weren’t getting a divorce, but wouldn’t two buildings billowing with smoke bright and early one morning as seen on TV mean something traumatic happened and my educator was not going to put things in perspective for me?

2) We weren’t about to get some time off from class. To talk about important things, I presume, such as the state of the world for example, because interest rates and money supply are by far more salient? Ironic, no?

Fast forward to the 10th anniversary Sept. 11 weekend yesterday.

I flipped open our friendly broadsheet, The Straits Times on Saturday and read the commentary by everyone’s favourite public intellectual, Kishore Mahbubani.

Kishore said that the US failed to seize the moment to unite humanity. And then he went on about China and plugged his own books.

His article made my stomach turn.

And then I scanned The Sunday Times and pored through Janadas Devan’s missive.

Janadas shared Kishore’s chastising tone, claiming the US wasted the chance to transform the world because the world was emotionally in tune with America when she was attacked exactly 10 years ago but now the feeling has slipped due to a bunch of missteps.

What incessant rubbish, I thought.

After reading both articles, I am made more annoyed than I was 10 years ago. And I’m getting even more riled because neither wordsmith was putting the 9/11 issue in perspective.

In fact, both supposedly “fair-minded” opinions (do consider the quotation marks around fair-minded as optional) are as flippant as my Economic tutor’s reaction and countenance on Sept. 12.

Here’s why: I find it utterly despicable and odious that so-called public intellectuals and opinion leaders should turn the tables on America and accuse it of having made a hash out of the only chance she had to unite the world – after it suffered the worst attack on its domestic soil where mad terrorists targeted civilians to leverage maximum impact from their atrocities.

Because what you need to know about the significance of Sept. 11 and the perpetrators of such a vulgar and grotesque act of obliteration that disregarded any form of civility or of our coming-of-age modernity is this:

– The perpetrators were not only hijackers of commercial airlines. They were also hijackers of religion, self-appointed death squads whose sole allegiance is (or rather, was) to their leader Osama bin Laden.

– They viciously hate Jews, Christians and Shia Muslims, or in fact, any unbelievers in general.

– What they want to promote is not terrorism. They are not even interested in promoting the cause of the marginalised in their community.

– They are not even keen about speaking out against oppressive US foreign policy.

– They were and still are trying to explicitly relay the message to the world that there is only one rule, which is by a despotic empire, of which Al-Qaeda’s sole purpose is to create a new, world wide Islamic caliphate, with a complete break from all foreign influences in Muslim countries.

So let me beg you, dear reader, to consider applying Occam’s Razor: How hard is it to simply see the religiously fanatical mad men for who they truly are?

How difficult it is to see that there are people who are self-conceited and vicious enough to take it upon themselves to shove their worldview down the throats of other people?

Why should we idly sit by and accept that perhaps, just perhaps, America is at fault because public intellectuals or opinion leaders say so?

Therefore, why sound clever by blaming America?

Look, if Kishore even went so far as to quote a Hong Kong journalist who said that “China owes a huge debt of gratitude to Osama bin Laden” for diverting America’s attention away from China and allowing the Chinese to focus on expanding their economy, then there is even more reason to be worried about the future.

You might be allowed to be hopeful that Al-Qaeda or its surrogates will never eventually achieve what they set out to do because they will collapse under the burden of their own ideology.

But if America is no longer mighty enough to take the fight to fanatics, then Al-Qaeda or its surrogates might just achieve their expansion plans.

Then it is really time to start freaking out because you shouldn’t be expecting China to do its share of protecting any time soon on your behalf, because they never even had their eye on the problem the last 10 years since 9/11.

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