Tag Archive | "377A"

All S’poreans turn gay once ambassador Tommy Koh said gay people should ‘try again’

All S’poreans turn gay once ambassador Tommy Koh said gay people should ‘try again’

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A mere suggestion is potent enough because being gay is irresistible.

tommy-koh-377a



Singaporeans from all walks of life, who were blissfully straight, have found themselves turned gay overnight.

This after ambassador Tommy Koh said gay people should “try again” to repeal 377A law in Singapore.

This mere suggestion has, as predicted by highly religious Singaporeans about the harmful addictive effects of homosexuality, turned millions of Singaporeans irreversibly gay overnight.

One ex-straight Singaporean, Tong Xing Lian, said: “I was happily straight and confident of my sexuality.”

“However, with Tommy Koh’s mere suggestion for gay advocates to repeal 377A, I suddenly find myself attracted to people of the same sex and wanting to engage in same-sex intercourse all the time.”

“Homosexuality is such a powerful force to cause these sorts of changes to take place overnight against our wills, just as highly religious Singaporeans predicted.”

Singaporeans who witnessed the transformation of their own sexual orientation attributed the changes to provocative liberal gay agitators, who use logic and arguments to sway others their way.

One other local, Lai Zuo Ai, said: “It is our fault we failed to remind ourselves we are straight 24/7 all the time.”

“The moment we let our guard down for just a short split second, we suddenly become gay af because someone happen to suggest homosexuality can find more social currency.”

“It is almost as if we were by default gay, but put on a straight, brave front as performance.”

“It is like we are so weak in the flesh, we cannot avoid being tempted to choose the gay way, which as we have since found out, is the one and only true way.”

“We have no choice but to live with our true gay identity as a nation from now on because homosexuality is just too powerful for anyone to defy.”

 





Pastor Khong: I am not gay

Pastor Khong: I am not gay

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Dressing in gay outfits does not make you gay

Punish me.... for I have sinned...

Punish me…. for I have sinned…

“I am not gay, I just like tight leather outfits alot,” said Pastor Lawrence Khong of the Faith Community Baptist Church in an exclusive interview with New Nation.

Tired of netizens circulating pictures of him looking like a gimp, Pastor Khong agreed to speak to us on the condition that we would help him set the record straight.

“It is a misconception that I am an anti-gay crusader. This is wrong. I love gays and lesbians. I love them like Mother Theresa loved her leprosy victims. Love the sinner, but hate the sin. You understand me?” he explained.

“Homosexual behaviour is wrong because it does not allow for reproduction, which is what being a good human being is all about. Therefore even if you have the urge to pork another man, or to wank off to Batman’s rubber nipples, you must not act on it.”

“I, for example, have a fondness for being chained up in tight stretchy material and whipped by the Lord, who is a man. But I have never asked another man to role play with me. Therefore, I am not gay.”

“Understand?”

 

Batman and Robin. Damn straight.

Thanks, Lawrence Khong, for standing up to the gay agenda

Thanks, Lawrence Khong, for standing up to the gay agenda

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Pastor Lawrence Khong of FCBC

Pastor Lawrence Khong of FCBC

Dear Lawrence Khong,

you know I’m your biggest fan. I go to your magic shows, and watched you as you won a SEA Games medal while riding on a horse. Yes, you are my favorite pastor in the whole universe.

My respect for you swelled to stratospheric heights when recently, you stood up to the reprehensible homosexual activists and their plot to destroy Singapore by repealing 377A (here and here).

Yes, sex between two men is disgusting. It should be banned. In fact, why stop there? Let’s call for a ban on homosexual advocacy, since they are on a warpath to bring turn everyone gay.  Put them in jail for sedition.

But even as I admire you, I felt you have not gone far enough. How about lobbying to make adultery a crime? After all, South Korea has done it and it is a model Christian nation. Many Christian men, even a Singaporean pastor, have lusted after women, making it worse of a marriage destroyer than gayness.

I am also a little let down that you have stopped speaking up on the casino issue. I mean, what happened? Isn’t gambling a heinous crime according to Christians, destroying lives and families?

Gambling is so in demand that Singaporeans have to fork out $100 to get in. On the other hand, no one chose to be a homosexual. If you give someone a hundred bucks and ask him if he wants to turn gay, he’d say no.

So you see, Pastor Lawrence Khong, as much as I admire you for being a cross between David Blaine, Michael Jordan, and Billy Graham, you got your strategy all wrong. You shouldn’t be targeting gays at all.

But we all know the reality don’t we? It is easy to target gays because no one really supports them in Singapore, especially not the government. They are a minority among the minority.

Which is why we need wise leaders like you to take courage. Since you believe the law is effective in countering whatever alien agenda that is creeping up on our shores, let’s lobby the government to ban pre-marital sex. Let’s ban abortion too. Let’s criminalize unhealthy food, which are making our kids fat and stupid.

The government’s double-standard is what’s really driving Singapore to its knees.

My prayers are with you, Pastor Khong. After all, we are on a holy mission to spread God’s love in Singapore.

Let’s pray that our Prime Minister will fall to his knees in repentance and accept the love of Christ. Let’s pray that more international Christian organizations will donate to FCBC to help us spread the love of God to every soul in Singapore and bring them to church.

We are doing the right thing, because Christian Love has no agenda. Except to brand gays as criminals.

With God’s blessings,
Conservative Nazi

S’pore govt to stop using the word ‘analyst’

S’pore govt to stop using the word ‘analyst’

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Word connotes buggery and no plans to drop 377A law yet.

Women who have the word “analyst” in their job title reportedly hit on three times as much.

The Singapore government has announced plans to drop the word “analyst” from all its official titles and designations following feedback that it connotes buggery.

“A spectrum of homosexual references spring to mind when the word is mentioned. We get a lot of sniggering and it has come to a point we have to put a stop to things,” said Chi Bu Da, a senior manager from an unnamed government agency tasked to respond to media queries.

There have been several complaints from within government departments that employees who have the word “analyst” in their job titles bear the brunt of homosexual jibes.

Women with “analyst” in their job titles reportedly get hit on as much as three times more.

There have been no major incidents that resulted in bust-ups, although this new development is in line with plans to not repeal the 377A law, a legal tradition bequeathed upon us colonial subjects by our British master overlords since time immemorial, which makes buggery between consenting men a form of criminal activity.

In the pipeline are also plans to replace the word “analysis” with other less titillating nouns.

None of the synonyms come to mind naturally, but the government is looking to go so far as to invent a new word to replace it.

Chi explained: “‘Analysis’ sounds like something to do with buggery and electrolysis, and it is unpleasant.”

“But we abolished its use mostly because it is quite funny! Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!”

Looking to be abolished are also words such as “onus”, “annals” and “rectitude”.

Anyone born under the Pisces zodiac will also no longer be hired to work for the government as “Pisces” sounds too alike to “faeces”.

Just last month, a senior manager working in a government-linked company landed in trouble for a comment he made in the office that was deemed inappropriate.

As part of his promotion and higher pay package, his colleagues bought the senior manager a branded fountain pen.

Typically, such pens are gifted to people in the corporate sector and the heavier and chunkier the pen, the greater the aura of superiority one exudes.

After receiving his fountain pen fashioned by Parker, the senior manager exclaimed: “See how large my pen is!”

He was roundly fired.

Gay portal Fridae receives investment, S’pore society opening up?

Gay portal Fridae receives investment, S’pore society opening up?

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What’s apparent is that Singapore’s gay scene has thrived despite receiving a cold shoulder. But it looks like society is finally warming up.

By Terence Lee

If you wear blue, you're bound to stand out. Photo: Missybossy

Yowzer!

News just hit that Fridae, a Singapore-based gay social network, has received funding from LGBT Capital, an Asia-based investment fund that supports Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender causes.

Started in 2000, way before the phrase ‘social network’ was even invented, Fridae claims to have some 1.5 million registered members. Something hit me when I read about this: Singapore does in fact have a rather active and thriving LGBT scene, at least from an outsider’s perspective. Read the full story

Singapore Democratic Party sends mixed message

Singapore Democratic Party sends mixed message

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The usually gung-ho opposition party loses its teeth over candidate Vincent Wijeysingha, who could possibly be the first gay MP in Singapore.

By Terence Lee

Dr Vivian and team’s press statement

A video has been posted on the internet showing Vincent Wijeysingha participating at a forum which discussed the promotion of the gay cause in Singapore.

The discussion at the forum also touched on sex with boys and whether the age of consent for boys should be 14 years of age.

In the video, Wijeysingha was introduced as being from the SDP.

In addition to other comments, Wijeysingha stated: “I think the gay community has to rally ourselves. Perhaps one outcome of today’s forum would be, for those of us who are interested, to come together to further consider how we can address the 377 issue as well as further rights issues in relation to gays and lesbians.”

We believe that candidates should be upfront about their political agenda and motives, so that voters are able to make an informed choice.

The issue is not Wijeysingha’s sexual orientation. That is a matter for him.

The video raises the question on whether Wijeysingha will now pursue this cause in the political arena and what is the SDP’s position on the matter.

LET’S be honest: Dr Vivian Balakrishnan is a shrewd tactician.

Conscious of the fact that many Singaporeans still frown upon homosexuality (see survey by NTU), he questions the motives of the SDP and especially its openly-gay candidate Vincent Wijeysingha, who is leading a team in Holland-Bukit Timah GRC against Dr Vivian.

Although liberal-leaning Singaporeans may be disgusted by this assault, there is a segment of Singaporeans who would resonate with it. These voters would be uncomfortable with having a gay MP in Parliament, and they would not overlook his sexual orientation, no matter how brilliant or articulate he proves to be.

Even the SDP knows this.

In a video response to Dr Vivian’s insinuations, SDP Secretary General Chee Soon Juan tried to downplay his party’s liberal stance on homosexuality.

“We are not pursuing the gay agenda and none of our MPs will,” he says at the beginning of the video, and repeats himself near the end: “Will the SDP pursue the gay cause? I answer forthrightly and without equivocation: No.”

He then turns the tables on Dr Vivian, daring him to be transparent about the passe issue of inflated spending during the Youth Olympic Games’ inflated spending. Red herring anyone?

Backed into a corner, the SDP seemed like it was forced to come up with a hasty, half-baked response. And it almost felt like they were outright denying their past support of the Repeal 377A movement. Trails of their previous anti-homophobia campaigns however, are still evident online.

This raises the question: If Vincent does get into Parliament, can he truly guarantee that he will not back the abolishment of the discriminatory law? And if he does support the repeal of 377A, wouldn’t that, in the minds of voters, contradict the statement Chee Soon Juan made?

On hindsight, SDP would have done better by acknowledging their support for gay rights, while at the same time emphasising that they are a political party for all Singaporeans.

The party’s response is a symptom of the identity crisis they are facing, a problem highlighted by media professor Cherian George, blogger Alex Au, and Straits Times journalist Tessa Wong. The SDP of the past has been admired for their loud, stubborn support towards issues it cares about, a stark contrast to the chameleonic tendencies of the Worker’s Party.

Yet recently, they have taken a more pragmatic stance, emphasising bread and butter issues over civil liberties.

Dr Vivian seems heartily aware of this schizophrenia, judging by his remark that Vincent’s team are “strange bedfellows”, since it is a marriage of a left-leaning social worker (Vincent) with a former civil servant (Tan Jee Say) and a psychiatrist Ang Yong Guan, a Christian.

Smelling blood, he struck first, attempting a kill before the opposition party could release their election manifesto.

Whether it will become a major electoral issue in the GRC going forward depends on how Dr Vivian, the SDP, and the media respond to this issue in the coming days.

Much also depends on the voting bloc Dr Vivian is counting on, and if they will succumb to the politics of fear: Fear that a homosexual who makes it into Parliament will not represent the interests of the electorate, and fear that a repeal of 377A will lead to the end of the world and the collapse of civilisation as we know it.

And for those who resist his tactics, is their disgust enough to sway them from the PAP vote?

So here’s where the SDP has to make a decision: Either appeal to the same segment of voters Dr Vivian is wooing, or stay the course, state their convictions, and give these voters the benefit of the doubt. Because in the long run, the SDP could become the party of choice.

Dr Vivian may be a shrewd tactician, but he’s certainly not winning the moral war. The ground is shifting beneath our feet: Minister Mentor Lee Kuan Yew, who is cool with gay MPs, believes acceptance of homosexuality will grow.

In the book Hard Truths, he says: “Homosexuality will eventually be accepted. It’s already accepted in China. It’s a matter of time before it’s accepted here.”

And when that day comes, let’s see how history will remember Mister Vivian Balakrishnan.