Alcohol failed to cause riot at Clarke Quay past 3 years since Little India riot occurred

Posted on 26 December 2016

Authorities not sure what went right.

clarke-quay-drinking

Authorities still grappling for answers as to why the Little India riot occurred in December three years ago were left even more puzzled as watering hole Clarke Quay did not experience a similar incident the previous year, last year and this year.

This despite Clarke Quay having all the elements there at one place to start the most proper and epic riot.

An official spokesperson, Qu Da Jia, said: “All the contributing factors present in Little India three Decembers ago have been similarly available in Clarke Quay throughout the past three years: People, alcohol and dustbins for tossing.”

“But nothing happened.”

Singaporeans from all walks of life, who can see things clearly for what they are if they are sober enough, have also expressed their amazement that Clarke Quay was not ground zero given that there are more drunks there and alcohol is way overpriced.

Qu Pia Zui, a local said: “A bottle of beer for S$14? I’m surprised no one has started a fight over that yet.”

However, the lack of riots at Clarke Quay has been shown to be a result of expensive alcohol possessing certain anti-rioting elements.

A Singaporean scientist, Dr Lim Kar Tor had discovered that the two main anti-rioting properties present in expensive alcohol are called “wealth” and “opportunity”, which make a difference in the reactions of drinkers.

Dr Lim explained then: “You can find these properties called ‘wealth’ and ‘opportunity’ only in expensive alcohol. Once you’ve consumed enough of it, you wouldn’t be upset with your lot in life.”

 

 

 

 

 

 





This post was written by:

- who has written 2370 posts on New Nation.

Wang Pei can be considered a new citizen of Singapore. She has been here all her life, just that her environment's changed beyond recognition.

Contact the author