Underprivileged banker suffers meltdown from low quality of life

Posted on 12 November 2012

When senior Barclays employee Olivier Desbarres made his way to Singapore last year in a tiny boat crammed with other equally impoverished immigrants, he was sure that the fast-growing city-state held infinite promises for a hardworking Frenchman like himself. As the rickety 60-foot yacht made its way into Keppel Bay Marina, the wide-eyed Olivier gazed at the lights, the sounds — the opportunity to strike it big.

He was determined to achieve the Singapore Dream.

But that was not to be.

“Singapore has failed Mr Desbarres,” said Espi Gee, spokesperson for Attract Residents of Super Expatriates (ARSE), the government body responsible for doling out tax breaks to attract high net worth individuals to reside in Singapore.

“We’re terribly disappointed that we were unable to provide him with the Singapore Dream standard of living that we promised all our expatriates. But times are tough — economic stagnation has pushed the entry level for ‘super-rich’ to even more unreachable levels. It is unfortunate that in this case, Mr Desbarres was unable to make the cut.”

Indeed, the poverty-stricken banker, who served as head of Barclays FX strategy in Asia, was denied even the most basic necessities of an executive in the financial industry. Despite paying a premium for his modest Bungalow at Wimborne Road, he was tormented everyday by the construction work at another property nearby.

“Back home in Bangladesh, there was construction and noise in the slum all the time,” said construction worker Mohammad Mohammad Mohammad.

“I have a phobia of zinc roofs too. We’re both migrant workers coming to a faraway land to make a living. I totally see where he’s coming from, and I understand his plight,” he said.

News that Olivier Desbarres had been sacked for his high profile meltdown has been met with widespread sympathy from other high-flying individuals in Singapore such as former NTUC senior executive Amy Cheong and former NUS scholar Sun Xi.

“Olivier was a good man. While the Chinese drive recklessly in their Ferraris, Olivier was merely behaving like a classic French douche bag. It really was a cultural misunderstanding fundamentally,” said Gee.

“The government believes in equal treatment for all — even for poor-rich men like Olivier who’re wealthy but did not quite make the cut to the super-elite. If he were richer, he could have just bought over the house under construction to shut them up but unfortunately, he doesn’t make enough,” she said.

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  • Cuthbert Plunger

    Very good guys. We need a Singapore Onion.

  • Laal

    Poor dude. Because liberal pro-equality Singaporean dogs cannot empathize with the daily torments of this glorious Frenchman so they complain. So now we put a golden hair God to poverty.

    Singaporeans ought to be smitten with more floods and fatal accidents

  • Lol

    Seems like Laal is a french dog….

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