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PM Lee mulls sexual favors for Ministers in bid to combat corruption

Posted on 22 June 2012

The recent investigations and arrests in the civil service  has left Prime Minister Lee Hsien Loong fuming mad, an insider with knowledge of the situation disclosed.

“He’s pissed, that’s for sure, and you can expect to see him crack the whip to ensure ministers don’t end up getting caught in a compromised position,” says our source.

The Prime Minister has tabled a raft of other measures for consideration. The most controversial one: Offer sexual favors for Ministers as part of their compensation package, to ensure they don’t seek illicit sexual pleasure.

Singapore has been hit by a recent spate of high profile investigations and arrests of senior government servants for corruption, the most recent being Lim Cheng Hoe, Chief of Protocol at the Ministry of Foreign Affairs.

Earlier this month, another two senior civil servants, Peter Lim and Ng Boon Gay, were charged for performing sexual gymnastics with women seeking favorable government contracts.

In a private discussion among the ruling cabal, PM Lee was said to have floated the sexual favors as political perk idea to the Ministers, who reacted to the plan with “cautious optimism” and “under-table high-fives”.

“The thought was, let’s bring in the most talented foreign prostitutes from around the world to service our hardworking Ministers. I actually like the plan; it goes to show how innovative our top politcal minds can be,” says the insider.

Singaporeans we spoke to, however, were upset when they heard about it.

“Outrageous! Cheap, ugly, and foreign prostitutes have been stealing jobs from locals at Geylang and Desker Road. Now they want to compete with high-class sex workers too?” says Rose Tan, a Philosophy undergraduate that moonlights as a top-flight sex worker by night.

Local celebrities are apparently displeased with the Prime Minister’s suggestion to favor foreign contractors.

“When we heard that Zhang Ziyi has been servicing top Chinese officials, we were excited. The money is good, and we want in. Local celebrities are underpaid and unappreciated anyway,” says a Channel 8 female starlet, who is known to hook up with Facebook co-founder Eduardo Saverin.

Even certain members of the opposition parties are unhappy. Their chief concern: The decision to limit sexual playtime to Ministers is biased towards the PAP, since the ruling party gets to pick the Ministers from within their ranks.

“Once in a while, we get a Yaw Shin Leong,” says an unnamed Worker’s Party member, “if we don’t give sexual favors to MPs to relieve stress, how are they supposed to keep their willies in their pants?”

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  • Blur Angmo

    How come Ng Boon Gay was involved with a woman ?

    Maybe it was his brother Ng Boon Bi.

  • Wong Estella

    The above information is inaccurate. I am not working for Channel 8.

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