PAP Hougang candidate Desmond Choo blames Diablo 3 for poor rally turnout

Posted on 21 May 2012

By Olbaid Tan

Fresh from his first by-election rally in Hougang, which had a disappointing turnout estimated at less than a thousand, PAP candidate Desmond ‘Baby Face’ Choo seemed calm.

Until he heard the reason why some of his supporters failed to turn up. Prior to the rally, he sent out a mass SMS exhorting his buddies to show up and cheer for him.

They never responded.

Shrugging it off, he went on stage to deliver his speech.

“I’m furious,” he says, showing this reporter his iPhone, “many of my buddies were too busy playing Diablo 3 to bother coming for the rally.”

One of the texts, from a friend in the banking industry, said: “Sry. Busy slaying demons now. Will catch your speech online.”

Another, this time from a public relations executive: “Opps, I forgot today is your rally. I was trying hard to upgrade my witch doctor to lvl 13. Gonna skip work tml. LOL.”

Both of these friends have been his faithful supporters ever since he first joined politics in the last election.

“This shows how computer games have increasingly become a bad influence on Singaporeans. We must control and regulate them,” he warns at a press conference.

“But here’s the truth: My rally had a poor turnout not because people are lukewarm about the PAP. Those Diablo 3 addicts are a minority,” he adds.

However, reports coming in from PAP activists have confirmed that the rally’s poor attendance was the  direct result of Diablo 3’s launch, which saw an extremely long queue that extended outside Funan Digital Mall.

A volunteer, who declined to be named, says between sobs that her boyfriend has not been responding to her texts and calls for the past three days.

Self-styled political pundit Eric de Yaya blames Desmond Choo for this outcome.

“It went downhill ever since he decided to appeal himself to the young voters, he rulminates, “The Worker’s Party’s Png Eng Huat, on the other hand, is endearing to the older folks, many of whom struggle to start up a computer, let alone play a computer game.”

Call it bad timing and bad luck.

When Desmond was asked if he will be making a police report against the makers of Diablo 3, he rubbished the suggestion.

“It’s still a gentlemen’s fight. I think in a gentlemen’s fight we must present the facts to the residents. Do not add more to it; do not discount from it. Lay it out on the table for people to decide,” he added.

This story was delayed as the writer was too busy completing Diablo 3 on Hardcore mode. We apologise for the tardiness.

 

 

 

 

 





This post was written by:

- who has written 268 posts on New Nation.

Joey is an intern at New Nation. He hopes to be as funny as Belmont one day and get laid at least twice a month.

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  • DVader1000

    He should look on the bright side. Imagine if his friends turned up for the free food and played Diablo 3 during all the speeches…

  • ZealotPaladin

    Eh please la reach level 13 only takes 2-3 hours, skip work for wat

    • Test

      maybe he damn noob. or he playing many characters at once.

      • lolwtfpap

        Probably damn noob.

  • sylvanian

    this is so funny! i like the part where u asked if he would raise a police report!! hah

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  • Keit

    This Desmond choo just so childish putting blame on a game….

    • efefef

      haha you believe? so gullible this site is a fake news site like the onion 

  • Keitisanidiot

    and Keit is an idiot for believing this story to be true.. hahahaha

    • Keitisstupid

       especially when the tagline of this site is ‘ 50% real news ‘

  • Lonii

    Don’t be lame la.. How can he blame on D3 ? Although i’m not a gamer, but he thinks he’s so big shot that everyone including his close friends got to stop their personal lifestyle just for him? I don’t think so!! I think he should be thinking what went wrong? Ask himself if he’s really that important to his friends ? So furious for what? Should get alive !! Play some games dude!! Unless u guys can mark whatever you guys have said. Empty promises !!!

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=534810990 William Tan

    Alamak! when elected, you get close to become millionaire, but they remain the same as following digs.

  • Antlsy

    Omg! I hope no foreigner is seeing this! Blaming computer games?! Tsk..tsk… Speechless!

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Kojak-Bt/1535172493 Kojak Bt

    Hi Kojakbt here. Have 

    • Ubiwan

      KojakBT….where have you been ? Missed your lovely comments !

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Kojak-Bt/1535172493 Kojak Bt

    New Nation bros and sis, have posted this on TRE :)
     

    • Terence Lee

      thanks for sharing!

  • -_-

    … Some people need to get a sense of humour.

  • kwk

    I bet my comment will receive lots of dislikes, but if you are willing to take a little of your time to scroll up, and place your mouse cursor over the icon newnation, it says “fake news” 

  • http://profile.yahoo.com/3EODQP6XDCQKZEH4RBCGOKKPP4 NQSH

    WTF??

  • Vikyc48

    Gentlemen’s fight??  More like a gentleman versus a moron.  Can’t you see the writing on the wall?? 

  • ZzZzZzZ

    he’s gonna blame diablo 3 when he loses

  • broylim

    Seriously? Why do I feel like this article is made up even though I would very much like it to be true.

  • Animal Farm

    PAP blames the whole world except themselves, something is seriously wrong, right?

    • James Bond

      Seriously? This is a fake news site. Goodness, people like you probably believe everything that you are told.

  • http://profile.yahoo.com/5SPPJWXNIRBHNWGWAG5ZWYN2IM airvv

    bullshit~~~~

    everyone has been waiting for Diablo 3 for the last 10+ yrs … what is Desmond Choo to Diablo 3?

  • Haojie29

    hahahaha this shows that diablo is even more important den ur meaningless speech!!!! hahaha

  • maverick1492

    News maybe fake, but one picture says a thousand words. 

  • Sillyporean

    They should have their rally @ Funan instead…..

  • Undeniable

    If people really wanted to support, they would still make the effort to take time out to go and support

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  • Bherjs

    Shld post on 9gag. with caption. CANT GET ENOUGH SUPPORTERS FOR RALLY. 
                                                   BLAMES DIABLO 3

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=525462983 Mary-Anne Lee

    this is funny shit 

    • Terence Lee

      thanks for the love :)

  • YY

    DON’T BE TOO HAPPY TO SLAM…THIS IS A FAKE NEWS

  • lol

    “I am my own man” tsk tsk

  • Ehtoh

    people already knew what PAP Want …..But PAP Don’t know what we want . so people Don’t going the PAP Rally to support………..
    that why PAP Rally 没什么人…….

  • http://www.facebook.com/Elliott.Soh Elliott Soh

    It’s 50% real news as a means to satire those it targets, to convey a negative sentiment towards a particular party, antagonising the latter with ideas that relate to popular culture so as to garner negative attention towards the latter.

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