Reader is troubled by the state of sex education in Singapore

Posted on 02 January 2012

Dear New Nation editor,

As a parent of an only son, I am deeply troubled by the recent news regarding the state of sexuality education in Singapore’s public schools.

It has been announced in the news that the focus has recently been shifted from contraception to abstinence and this is an area the religious and non-religious have been fighting about for the longest time.

I am very religious but I don’t know why there is so much fuss on telling youngsters about these issues in the first place, because the more it is mentioned to them, the more aware they are of it and the more likely they will do something that is wrong.

That is why, I have never talked about the birds and the bees with my son or will I ever broach the topic with him.

I know that I don’t have to because my son is normal and too young for such things. He will find out about the birds and the bees when he is ready to marry in the future and this is a topic best left to him and his future wife, and the religious counsellors.

I want him to be just like me: To find out about sex only after I got married.

Long before this sexuality education issue got its airing in public media, I have given it some thought: I wanted to protect my son so I have always sent him to a same-sex school.

Currently, my son is in secondary school. He is from an all-boys institution. Therefore, knowing this fact, I know for sure he will not feel any temptation with girls because he is surrounded only by other boys.

This was something I thought about when I first sent him there to study.

Needless to say, it is for this reason that I don’t like the idea of MOE going to my son’s school to teach the innocent boys about the birds and the bees. And even show them videos!

This will only make them more curious.

I know my boy. If he is really curious, he will refer to his religious texts for answers.

I also know for a fact my boy does not have any temptation. He is always hanging out with other boys his age.

He says he is not ready to date girls because he wants to give it more thought and I encourage his decision.

When he wants to hang out with his guy friends, I allow him. No questions asked. He even tells me they go for sleepovers at each others’ house or camps – at least four times a year.

During the semester, he is a very active student who spends a lot of his time in CCAs. He tells me his whereabouts so I know he spends most of his time in school.

He frequently brings his classmates and schoolmates home after school when my husband and I are away at work and I allow them.

This is better than for them to hang out at shopping centres and meeting gangsters or girls who would lead them astray.

But I am no prude: I encourage my boy to follow trends that are at the height of fashion. I allow him to go shopping at his favourite outlet in Orchard Road, Abercrombie & Fitch. I heard from my son the clothing there are affordable and the staff are tall and friendly.

I am proud to add that I have raised my son as a proper, hygienic and healthy child.

For example, he says grace before every meal.

I allow him to do his own laundry.

He also likes to take long showers, some times as often as three times a day.

I know Singapore’s weather is very hot and even after his third shower, he can look quite lethargic and drained.

Although he is a bit bookish and not very athletic, he takes a keen interest in sports such as water polo and dragon boating.

Whenever his school has a match or competition, he will be there to show his support.

He has even made several close friends with some of the water polo and dragon boat boys.

Even when his school’s water polo and dragon boat teams are not playing, he will go to the events to show support to other teams’ members.

Not only that, my son makes friends of all ages.

He is very sociable.

Once, I found many photos of him with two older men taken around Tanjong Pagar area. I am very proud! My boy says he is looking to intern around that area once he is done with secondary school! So ambitious right, Central Business District!

And almost all of his friends on Facebook are male.

I know many other parents out there are always concerned about their children. But not for me.

I never find magazines such as FHM or Maxim under his bed.

I only find plenty of body building magazines and Men’s Health magazines. They show a lot of photos of shirtless men in various body building or workout poses.

This inspires my boy to bulk up his build, which I support.

Last but not least, I hope the government can be sensible and do the right thing with regards to the sexuality education issue.

They should ban it like chewing gum.

Yours sincerely,
Confident Mother of Only Son

This post was written by:

- who has written 2582 posts on New Nation.

Wang Pei can be considered a new citizen of Singapore. She has been here all her life, just that her environment's changed beyond recognition.

Contact the author

  • Nirvanaman

    Pity your son.

  • Davin Ng

    Obvious troll is obvious.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=556703662 Calmela Hamid

    As a ex-secondary school teacher, let me say that kids tend to do an angel and devil routine. Hence when we tell parents that their kid misbehaved, they really sound defensive.

    Also, as a former student of a single sex school, let me say that just becasue there are no members of the opposite sex doesn’t mean we don’t find ways to get around the issue. That’s really silly..

    In addition, even if your own kid doesn’t do these things, his friends do and trust me when I say, they talk to each other about it. Especially since teenaged boys are at the peak of their sexuality and are naturally curious, you should prepare him.

    It’s silly to think just because kids learn about sex, they will have sex. That’s what schools and parents are trying to do – teach them values that go hand in hand with this. Also, the less you talk to him about sex, the less he will talk to you about it in the future and what happens if he gets in trouble or has serious questions about sex but he can’t come and talk to you about it? In fact, you should have started much younger, in primary school even. Teach him about sex before his hormones go rampant when he grows older.

    • genie

      as an ex-secondary school teacher, i can’t believe you cannot tell what’s satire. 

      • Extraonepls

        that’s why she is an EX-teacher.

        • trollspotter

          too bad not sEX-teacher

  • Edwin Tam

    Wahahahahahah

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=525462983 Mary-Anne Lee

    heehee

  • Thad86

    SO overt it’s covert HAHA

    • Eddie

      Sherlock Holmes FTW

  • Qwerty

    Seriously deluded parent…

  • http://www.facebook.com/hengterence Terence Heng

    Don’t people understand that this is merely a satire? Look at what is NewNation’s slogan: 50% real news! come on people, don’t be so stupid as to believe that the above “letter”!

  • Alibaba

    your son sounds kinda gay.

  • http://www.facebook.com/xnsdvd Shannon Lim

    Damn you Davin! I was going to say that… 

  • offended

    Dear New Nation,

    I am offended that the MOE logo has been defaced. Please restore it or else I’m going to write a letter to the MOE.

    • Editor

      Write in and CC us on that. We’d love to publish. Thanks! – Shihan

      • Offendedtimestwopluschop

        Dear New Nation,

        I am offended that offended has offended me. I am going to write an offensive letter to offended. A LETTER YOU HEAR! 

        Please send me offended’s address.

        • http://www.facebook.com/ryuu.fong Ryuu Fong

          lolwut trolllllllllllllllssss

        • Trolololo

          Epic troll reply is epic

        • Fwoah

          Inception… Mother of God..

  • Hotmail

    FAct:Your son is gay.For sure.Do you find lots of wet tissues in his room hidden underneath with all those magazines as well?

  • Stop Living in Your Dreams

    You are just a dominant parent. Why don’t you just leash your son like a dog and bring him whatever he goes so that you can control the way he thinks and behaves?

    I refer to “I want him to be just like me: To find out about sex only after I got married.”. Which era were you born in? Internet is so proliferated, he probably knows more than you know now without you even realizing.

    Studying in a single sex school like some of the readers mentioned does not suppresses his biological needs.

    And I am sure you are a confident mother in molding your son into a gay. Great job!

    • obvious la dey

      he is obviously trolling duh..it amazes me that dudes around here can’t appreciate sarcasm.

  • vvaam

    trolls be trollin’.

  • Alex

    Seriously, I am not sure whether I am more amused by this blatantly fake letter making fun out of narrow minded views on sex education or by the reactions in the comments that are actually taking this seriously!!!

  • Yoohoo

    love it!

  • current teacher, father of two

    Affirmative. I think you should think about how you should accept you son as gay, as it is likely so… read more on the pink dot movement in singapore, and relevant materials to prepare yourself…

  • Hong

    “He will find out about the birds and the bees when he is ready to marry in the future and this is a topic best left to him and his future wife, and the religious counsellors.I want him to be just like me: To find out about sex only after I got married.”

    This is 2012, time has changed, method of communication/teaching should also change with time. Now most students have access to (misleading/truth) information anytime, anywhere via laptop/tablets/mobile phones. He will be exposed to sex-related information even before he gets married. 

    Do you want him to learn about sex from his friends/internet? Or do you prefer instilling the right values in him, and teach him how to handle misleading information from internet.

  • ejicje

    …. your son is gay ……

  • Pingback: Obvious troll is obvious, but people don't get it lol - www.hardwarezone.com.sg

  • Guest

    one word.GAY

  • Trolls

    trololol ftw

  • Djuis

    cool story bro!

  • Hansdanil

    your son is as gay as a picnic basket!!! wauahahahahahahahaha

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=600110749 Ting Young

    LOL. It’s either fake or gay. Or both.

  • ryuuxfinn95

    Congrats you have a son whos homo!

  • Trololo

    Obvious troll is obvious.

  • :D

    “He also likes to take long showers, some times as often as three times a day”..

    I see what he did there…..

  • Thyfallenbeats

    Your son’s gay you fuckin idiot!

  • Heady

    I read letter. I loled. 

    I read replies. I loled again. 

  • Guest

    Very funny. I hope people realise this is a spoof. “My son is not yet ready to date. The only woman he likes is Barbara Streisand. He has a penchant for show tunes and keeps telling me is is Gleeful. I guess this means he’s happy.”

  • Fireport

    I love how troll this writer is xD

  • Adi

    Are you fucking serious ?…

  • Trolldad

    Epic troll!!!

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=646697140 Sean Padman McMenamin

    “I am very religious but I don’t know why there is so much fuss on
    telling youngsters about these issues in the first place, because the
    more it is mentioned to them, the more aware they are of it and the more
    likely they will do something that is wrong.
    That is why, I have never talked about the birds and the bees with my son or will I ever broach the topic with him.

    I know that I don’t have to because my son is normal and too young
    for such things. He will find out about the birds and the bees when he
    is ready to marry in the future and this is a topic best left to him and
    his future wife, and the religious counsellors.”Ahahahahahahahahahhahahahhahahahahah. Me Gusta.People, look at the crest at the end of the article? See the troll faces? First class trolling man, first class!

  • TROLL

    YOU MAD BRO? Your son will end up fucking boys

  • http://twitter.com/mhisham Mohd Hisham

    Cool story madam! :) 

  • Lol

    lololololol

  • Buttwiser

    This is &%$#^% hilarious! Awesome parody piece, Confident-mother-of-only-son! I’ve just realised how many misguided & humorless zealots there are in Singers too!

  • Guest

    THIS SOUNDS REALLY FAKE.

  • Wahlaoe

    My god. You mean so many Singaporean readers are so blur that they can’t see satire when it’s right in front of their eyes? Do they need a sign that says “Satire. Not meant to be taken at face value”?

    • Trollolol

      simi is satire? so cheem limpei cannot understand

  • Amused

    absolute genius!

  • Guest

    Surely this letter is fake right? It must be a hoax right? It sounds like a piece written for The Noose as the clueless mother who doesn’t realize how gay her son is! 

  • Heads Up

    I think “They should ban it like chewing gum.”

    is more than enough to judge the seriousness of this article

    You uptights just been trolled

  • Fdd

    your son is gay. hands down.

    sincerely , all normal straight guys.

  • Trololololol

    They see her trollin’ they hatin’

  • Hi2day

    All the above pointed to signs of a gay,sorry Singapore is NPR ready for gay marriage

    • Hi2day

      Nvr**

  • http://www.facebook.com/benjamin.csh Benjamin Chua

    Your son’s definitely gay.

  • *Smile

    Older men @ tanjong Pagar??? Hey ‘Play’ also just HAPPENED to be around tanjong pagar. ^_^

  • He’s gay.

    Newsflash… he’s gay.

    • Alex

      NEWSFLASH – He’s not real. It’s a spoof!!!

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100002325769990 Tulan Kia

    Hanging around Tg Pagar with older men, good. Very good.
    Is the mother aware that Tg Pagar is a concentrated gay district filled with gay pubs, gay saunas and gay cafes?

  • Alex

    Are people seriously not getting that this is a spoof?

  • Raymond

    ya i think ur son is a gay, and what’s the link between sex education and A&F staffs whom you describe them as tall and friendly? pls be careful, you will not find it proud if your son turns into a gay. and i supposed u enjoyed reading those body building magazines and Men’s Health magazines with alot of shirtless guys, ya? and in this letter, you did not even mentioned the word “girl” and “female” which can confirm that you son is gay.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Amanda-Lee/1132417772 Amanda Lee

    Once again, my fellow Singaporeans are more than willing to demonstrate how awful they are at spotting Internet trolls.

  • Agow Pow

    This letter is neither authentic, nor is it by a troll…. 

    Look at the top people – it says it clearly “50% real news”. The whole site it is from is full of spoofs and humour.

  • brightenUp

    your son is definitely gay

  • Eirucbiur

    You son is as gay as Twilight 

  • http://www.facebook.com/ryuu.fong Ryuu Fong

    Me gusta :3 Nicely written, I like how this article is written from this angle. Guiz need to read more critically man, sarcasm is in the eye of the trolls.

  • http://www.facebook.com/ryuu.fong Ryuu Fong

    that’s as good as insulting the gay community.

  • JustAnotherCommenter

    Just on a side note, Even if the son is gay or straight, I believe every parent will love him the way he is. And the mother who wrote this article should be supportive of her son, even if he is gay, or hiding things behind her back.

  • Student

    I feel sad for your son.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Kevyn-Yeo/566646822 Kevyn Yeo

    U know wat’s the reason ur son is not sex educated? Coz he only knows birds and bees… 

  • new

    troll is a successful troll

  • Hartz

    Woman!..because of you, your son has turned…well sorry to say..BISEXUAL!! Geez, wake up!

  • Just an opinion

    Dear Madam, the movement of your son seems highly suspicious. It is highly suspected that he is a gay. Taking pictures with older men isn’t what a normal teenager would do at his age. Neither having so many sleepovers with no adult supervision or reading only masculine magazines shows that your son is healthy. It is normal to be attracted to the opposite sex, I am sure you look at handsome guys and dream about who you will be marrying in your teenage years despite the fact that it was much more conservative then. With technological advances, it is not very possible for your son to not understand BGR. I think it is best for you to talk to your son to test whether he is more interested in men or women. 

  • TROLL

    I got bad news ma’am, your son is gay.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=763607328 William Yang Yi

    Trolling at it’s best. Shame on the rest of you NOT laughing at this.

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=740399764 Gingers Garlics

      but i did laugh, except the comments made it even more so! XD

  • Lawliet

    Sounds like a perfect product of Singapore Inc. Good job.

  • LOLL

    Since you have found out about sex after you are married, i presume that your husband knows about sex then, so why are you restricting your son

  • eunice

    dear proud parent. 

    sad to say, your son is gay.

    • Bernard

      why sad to say? gay children cannot make parents proud meh? homophobe.

  • Romejon Paul

    I wanted to ban women from my son’s life too. But i took an arrow to the knee.

  • Ultraviolence

    I laughed. Pretty hard.

    Sadly, this reminds me of my own mom, who, while non religious (and I was also in mixed schools all my life), behaved and spoke in the exact same manner outlined above. I mean, I was less ‘obvious’ than said fictional son, but yeah. Understandably she was less than thrilled when I came out and is currently in a complete state of self-denial. Classy stuff.

  • Straightmale

    Your son is gay

  • Me_Gusta!

    Dear woman of only son ( whatever that is )

    Im sad to say that, by not allowing your son to learn about sex education and to know about se..Birds and bees…. is bringing you and your kid to a total loss. Look at the society we live in, then you decide what is good for your kid. 

    To find out that your kid is reading muscle mags to spur him to go into bodybuilding, well lets say you are just scratching the surface which u think is absolutely forbidden. 

    like the forbidden fruit..

    Anyway, i think you have just openly accepted your kid as gay, thus writing this possibly in total disbelieve, seeing that he mixes around with older men in Tanjong pagar, and have frequent sleepovers … OoppS!

    PS. I think the woman took a arrow to her knee, to find out the kid hid wet tissues in the cabinet.=D

    You got pwned lady, PWNED BIG TIME.

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=740399764 Gingers Garlics

      hello fellow troll, you fail. that cannot possibly be written by a real “concerned mother”. 😀

    • gingers have no souls

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  • http://www.facebook.com/kenghui.chew Chew Keng Hui

    yeah but u dun knoiw what he is doing behind ur back…

  • Wanderer

    you are not encouraging your son to be normal but otherwise.. think again..

  • Chao Lim

    Congrats…you’ve cultivated a fine member of the gay community. Men’s magazines + long showers three times a day. Genius.

  • Yalexis

    Gay son.. <3

  • Bo liao article

    duh

  • Troll_Rater

    Excellent troll, A++, would read again.

  • Purple9_twinkle

    Your son is definitely gay.

  • Joe

    lol. your son is gay!

  • fail

    LOL LMAO HOW U KNOW HE DONT WATCH PORN HE BRING HIS FREIDNS OVER TO WATCH PORN WHEN U NOT AT HOME O.O LOLOL

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1699134300 Ying Ying Lai

    Is this satirism? Well done, one of the hardest unseen passages I have read so far. And great  job in describing your son as a nerdish-bookish-gayish-hemophrodite. I am speechless by your overwhelming confidence.

  • Concerned Onlooker

    Dear Confident Mother of Only Son. First off, with the sex education, although they may be more tempted to do stuff, they will KNOW that doing that stuff is wrong. They will KNOW the risks. This is much better than not knowing anything about sex, and having to experiment to find out, without knowing that it is not right. 

    And do you know why your son is going to shower three times a day? And coming out lethargic and drained? I don’t think he’s only showering… Make sure your pipes don’t get clogged.Oh, and putting your son in an all boys school, since forever, will make him shy. He’ll never learn to interact with girls properly. Especially since he doesn’t have a sister. Good luck, he’ll very definitely only learn about real sex after he gets married. If he gets married. And what is he doing with two older men?? Good job Confident Mother of Only Son, you’re happy about it?! Did you know that kind of activity is illegal in Singapore?And I don’t know why you’re so smug. You’re either a troll, or you’re really really REALLY optimistic and idealistic about your son. Good luck, Confident Mother, because you seem far too overconfident, ignorant and unobservant to me. 

  • dumbsg

    You dumbshitassfaggots it’s satire==

  • LMAO

    Wow… and I thought my friend was quite gay already.

  • Jenchen25

    Dear confident mother of only son, I really think your son is gay and you are still SOOOO proud of him. There are so many obvious signs that he is heading this direction and you choose to deny them. All, i can say to you is good luck to you and your husband. I think it is NOTHING to be proud of as I have a son too myself. I would love that he interacts more with girls rather than guys to grow up as a normal individual. But at the end of the day, balance is the right thing to do.

    • Fallopian tubes

      Wow, way to miss the point of this satire.

  • http://twitter.com/Volvagia356 Raymond Choo

    Great example of Poe’s Law we have here

  • chris

    I pity the son and the husband. 

  • Joker

    More Singaporeans need to go to 9gag.com for a lesson on satire

  • Wei

    hilarious kekeke… well done, confident mother of only son

  • http://www.facebook.com/IanMadmonkey Ian MadMonkey

    ive been trolled. after reading the whole article, i was furious and typed out a whole f-ing essay not realizing that the two lions of f-ing ministry of f-ing education has the troll face on. FML. ps. hey singaporeans, you can stop scolding this cofident mother because its a f-ing troll. and if you dont know what is a troll, look at the ministry of education logo. the two lions. And if you still dont get it, close all the windows in your home, go to your kitchen, turn on all the gas, then sleep at your kitchen floor.

  • Sohma Kagura

    LOL.

  • Tihgiak

    The son is probably gay.

  • me

    I’m sorry … but I have to put it in – just because a boy does not mix around much with girls does not mean that they are not tempted. A lot of people are tempted by things or people simply because they do not know them well enough to judge them properly. Secluding him from girls will only make him want to find out more about them, and when he does – he will most likely not choose you as a source of information as you will only ban him further.

  • Anon

    [email protected]#!ing Poe’s Law…

  • Jeremy1988

    Now i know y there is a rising population in gays these days

  • Straightranger

    Men’s health? Pic with man at tajong pager? Near the gay club? Sleep over with guys? Mostly guy friends on FB? A&F? have u check out their ADs? Not ready to date girls?

    Sorry to say but i guess he’ll never be ready aye

  • Abc

    Nice try

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